da PoAmeister

Guess who's back ???

2007-04-16T15:01:00.000-07:00

And once again, your favourite most high and honourable majesty is back. Given the long sabatical one has taken, it would almost seem as if this was going to close down. What with google trying to take over blogspot(actually, they already have) and in the process making your's truly have to get a new account, the ordinary man on the street might actually think that google was using blogspot to try to tap on his royal majesty's true splendor.

Easter has gone by so quickly, so has the rest of the academic year....amazing how fast time moves. However, one of the few things remaining in constant is your royal highness' glory and splendor, not to mention amazingly intellectual chat. He was awarded the intellectual cunt award from the very prestiguous and aptly named YPP cunt awards 2007. FACT

To end off, your's truly just wants to remind all to continue reading one's posts(go brush up on your history of Poameister's amazing posts). He's bringing SEXY BACK.

Homecoming

2007-01-05T10:09:00.000-08:00

Roughly 3/4 of the holidays have passed. Needless to say, your's truly is obviously busier in the holidays as compared to term time. Such are the pitfalls of being such marvellous company that everyone wants a little bit of that limited entity which is I.

Am in a thoroughly good mood today as a particularly generous aunt has pledged a sizable amount for this charity group that I am helping. Pleasantly surprised for sure as your's truly was expecting 0 replies, since it was only an email sent out. Now be honest people, how many of you would actually open an email with the word 'donation' spelled out clearly in the title. Obviously, for a person as pristinely respected such as oneself, one would be quite certain that everyone would read it, and then comment as well as affirm the high standing that your's truly is placed within your esteem. And then go 'well, I'm sure someone else will donate and so I'll give this a pass.'

Another interesting fact this month is the way your's truly has been used as a weapon of mass destruction. Ha, and from this, one is not merely refering to one's exceedingly large instrument. But rather, being used as an emotional weapon to be unleashed on undeserving creatures. It is amusing to say the least. Needless to say, this thus affirms oneself as a true embodiment of a superior species.

Furthermore, your's truly went for carolling as well, thus dispelling swiftly with one movement, the notion that choirboys are wussys/homos/sistas/batty boys. Truly revolutionising the entire meaning of being in a choir. FACT, your's truly was given the task of delivering a monologue, one in which was obviously dispatched with the utmost authority. Lucky for my brother, who does have abit of his excellency's genetic code, he did do a commendable job of delivering the monologue in chinese. Obviously, nothing can go wrong when you are that closely related to your's truly.

Once again, this is your's truly, signing off.

Empire where the sun never sets

2006-11-11T13:25:00.000-08:00

A big hello to all you fans out there. In fact, make that a big SHOUT OUT to you all, all the way from the centre of the empire where the sun never sets....pfft, how the mighty have fallen, not that they would in anyway admit it, just like how them rafflesian girls burn their bras in secret(insider joke). Raffles by the way for those who are un-initiated is the name of the top school in Singapore in terms of mass producing an army of A-class students. 'What ?!! Only 3As for your A-levels ?! Pathetic..' The school if they could would probably shoot these infidels.

His most exalted highness is indeed having quite a M.I.N.T of a time 'oop north' in the cold and gloomy city of durham. Anyway, here are some interesting snippets of what your's truly has been up to.

Snippet 1:Tales of the Ladyboy Man-Eater

As part of the worst nightmare halloween party, your's truly decided to transcend boundaries into unchartered territory. Imagine, having to awake in the morning beside a ladyboy beside you, or worse, awaking to something long thick and damp(**in the interest of accuracy, for your's truly is trying to get in tune for the role ) being slapped across your face.

To put it succinctly, your's truly was HOT, FIT and well, words couldn't be used to describe the beauty that was on offer. In fact, it probably could rival some of the finest Thailand has to offer. FACT, some sleazebag, actually tried to touch up your's truly from behind. Not a nice feeling, but one that your's truly is accustomed to, except that this was coming from a guy instead of the hordes of females that are after your's truly's nice little pert ass.

Snippet 2: Tradition

Well, exactly what can be expected of the posh sophisticated and nose slightly tilted upwards Brits, but traditons upon traditions. Not that your's truly minds of course. Being able to put on a suit and looking suave is all part of what being your's truly entails. Formals, Balls and whatever swanky events you can think up of, they have it all. Freed from the shackles of sloppy dressing and the notion of dressing down, your's truly is thriving in this new environment.

Snippet 3: Helping the less fortunate

As all of my loyal subjects, you should know that your's truly is a man of compassion and integrity. Always helping the less fortunate and being such an example to mankind is something which comes as second nature. Your's truly had to go through a really tough interview in order to be able to volunteer his most amazing services. Think of it, here the people actually have to queue up to do volunteer work....in Singapore, we try ways and means of paying off other people to do it for us. Or we have attitudes such as if you're not good enough, 'life will kick you between the legs,' amazing quote by Wee Shu Min(elitist bra-burning extraordinaire). To cut things short, your's truly aced the interview and according to one of the panel, almost had them in tears. Thank you 1t1 and 1n1 scums, your's truly would never have envisaged that teaching you would actually benefit your's truly in such tangible ways.

This is the Poameister, signing off.

Geeks

2006-10-23T09:20:00.000-07:00

Geeks don't sleep around. Geeks, through their higher IQ and therefore greater understanding of the tragedy of human condition, know that the grass only seems greener on the other side of the fence. Hence, they instinctively stay loyal to their lovers through thick and thin. Their social skills are also not well developed enough to support an affair, and frankly, geeks generally aren't quite sure how they ended up with the lover they have attracted. When you date a geek, you know the geek will be yours until you are done.

Geeks are good at the things they try. When's the last time you met a geek who didn't have some secret skill just simmering below the surface of their lives, honed in the wee hours of the night? It could be hacking, playing video games, or the ability to insert and remove those stupid computer power plug things from drives without cursing or breaking a finger. Let sex become their new favorite late-night hobby, and you know that a geek won't quit until he or she has learned how to hack into your brainstem through specific genitalia interfacing in parallel with general dermal and oral bonding.

Geeks are not interested in status. Geeks became geeks because they chose to spend their time doing things that would not necessarily make them popular with everyone else in school, like sports and fashion. The ability to resist peer pressure is important to a geek. This means that a geek is more interested in their or your happiness than looking good to others, which is an important trait in a relationship.Geeks haven't formed bad habits.

After years of dating other women, many socially successful guys have become too confident to be intimate, think of women only for sex, and don't have any intention of letting what in their minds is "just another girlfriend" enjoy the last spring roll. Let us not even pry into the diabolical, dark, twisted, and depraved mind of the girl who has dated many men. None of this is true of the geek, however. The lack of past romantic partners allows the geek to approach lovers with the zest of the neophyte. Geeks are not full of romantic confidence; however, once coaxed from their emotional holes like tame bunnies, they are eager to please and enjoy their newfound relationship.

Geeks can concentrate. Geeks can focus their energy on one task with the intensity of a hunting cheetah. Granted, the task they are focussing on may have more to do with hunting orcs with 12-sided dice rather than hunting gazelles with claws, but the fact remains that a geek, once set upon a task and given Mountain Dew, becomes a tireless slave to their goal. Put a six-pack of Dew on the bedside table and a geek between the sheets, and you have found yourself one relentless lover.

Geeks have excellent finger dexterity. Geeks roll dice. Geeks play video games. Geeks flip pages in books. Geeks type a lot, and use characters like ~ and ^ and that no one else has any use for. Geeks use calculators and personal digital assistants. The sum total of this is that a geek knows how to use his or her fingers to greatest possible effect. Whether you have a button that needs pushing or a joystick that needs joy, a geek is the person for the job.

Geeks have imagination Once you have found your amazing lover, you wouldn't want things to become boring. That is where geeks prove their worth. Replayability is important to the value-conscious video-game playing geek, and this translates to relationships as well. Wouldn't you want to date someone who has created a Quake 3 mod? Wouldn't you want to date someone who has written steamy Everquest fan fiction involving elven incest? Wouldn't you want to date someone who wished they were Morpheus rather than someone who wished they were Barry Bonds?There are plenty of other reasons why geeks are the best lovers around, but don't just take my word for it. Find the nearest sexy geek and coax that person into asking you out, even if you have to do so using instant messanger.

I am a geek.

His majesty signing off.

Hangover

2006-10-12T03:38:00.000-07:00

One has never ever thought that it would be possible to be hungover on the amount of parties one can have. To be honest, your's truly is quite sick of hanging out till late everynight. The initial euphoria has mostly been turned into a form of cynicism.

Finally !

2006-09-26T06:25:00.000-07:00

Finally, seventeen magazine has decided to put an article about your's truly. Everyone should now buy a copy, as well as write in to seventeen to praise your's truly for his immaculate wit and request for more of yours truly !

Tea and Scones

2006-09-21T06:03:00.000-07:00

Weather:14-21
Days: 15

It comes as a great relief for your's truly that durham is not actually situated in the middle of nowhere with only cows for company. Havent seen even one cow as of yet. Being in campus so early means 2 things:

1) An opportunity to make life better for your's truly once term starts since now he's got quite the comparative advantage. Also, to rectify any problems which might occur and not be fixed if his majesty actually came as per scheduled.

bank account(check)
ensuite room(half-check)
how to get around the area(double check)

2) To get to know more people. Judging by the fact that asians are generally less popular and have less friends abroad, no doubt due to the conservative environment we've been brought up by, means tt your's truly(the only singaporean fresher), has to start making friends earlier. Everyone seems really friendly and surprise surprise, your's truly when compared to these people is quiet and with a halo around my head to boot. But, it is quite boring, especially since no freshers have yet to arrive and well, it is quite difficult to get on the same wavelength as them seniors.

Interesting fact:

The room the your's truly is going to be sleeping in had someone die there of a heart attack earlier in the summer. Hence it was not allocated out, as the college waited to see if anyone would step forward to take it. Now, your's truly had been praying for a ensuite room prior to the meeting to ask to be transfered to one. On knowing that there was an avaliability, your's truly's faith was tested yet again. The question beckoned as to whether or not to take the room. The answer was, after some pondering, yes(not a very big one..) as God had provided a room as per requested and all that required was for your's truly to accept that God would protect him. And hence, your's truly will be moving in in a couple of hours, albeit with the chaplain coming over to help cleanse the room...(i am obviously not tt brave yet). Well then, its all off to an exciting start !

Stay tuned people.

One full circle.

2006-09-01T03:43:00.000-07:00

And so, my dear students, it all comes to an end.

All the laughter, tears, sweat and sorrow will forever remain imprinted in yours truly's mind for the years to come. From the neccesant noise of the 'Bermuda Triangle' to the 'Battle of the Twerps', and on to the 'Cleopatra pose', it all added to the experience. Your's truly is glad that he was not given some proverbial scholars to teach, how terribly boring that would be...

This was an experience in which, the teacher was the student and student the teacher. You scums have no idea how much you've taught me and how much I've learnt from lessons had with you.

The measure of a person's self-worth should never be by the yardstick of mere academic results....of useless pieces of paper, of one-off examinations, because really, life is much more than that. The argument could carry on forever about ways in which to measure a person, and yet never find a pleasing conclusion to all. It is with a heavy heart that your's truly gives out lessons in how to do well in examinations(how many times have you heard me blare at you 'structure structure stucture'). Really, this should not be the way. Has it really come down to such a deplorable state? Of mere tricks and cunning being all what one needs to do well ?

How ironic it must be that the ones who profit most, a.k.a 'the proverbial rafflesian scholar'(no offense taken, you know I do so love hot rafflesian chicks), are the ones who go on to run the system, thus putting in place more checks and balances to ensure that generations onwards do not slip through the huge holes in the education system nets. Once again, despite their better efforts a maintaining equality, most once again slip through. And once again, it is the same kinds of people slipping through, mostly due to the fact that their parents have slipped through and have seen first hand the repercussions of those who do not. All your Rafflesians, ACsians, SCGS and MGS girls. Its quite simple really, the harder the exam gets, the more students fret, hence, those who can afford the best tuition(also known as system breakers) will do so in hopes of finding the formula to get past. A cheatcode or walkthrough if you would have it called that way.

So wherefore is the equality ? It is said that in 'meritocratic' Singapore, education is the great leveller, the one which all are on even footing. Bollocks ! I say. Wherefore art the equality which ought to be bestowed on thine students ? People who do not know where the loopholes are, do not have either the resources(money to hire top tuition teachers and not merely those students from uni out to make a quick buck) or the knowledge that there are such loopholes present to be exploited.

Once again the cycle repeats itself. Once again, the elite get richer, and the masses poorer because the sanctity of the system has already been breached and only those who know the code are allowed in. That is why you not see yours truly recite the national pledge. A pledge which is hollow.

Your's truly will end off now by telling all of his students to always keep fighting on. True, the odds are heavily stacked against you. But please, do not give up. At 13 or 15, if you give up now, what is going to happen to you in 20, 30 or 40 years time ? Fight on my little ones....I cannot make guarantees that you will be able to beat the system, but what I do know, is that you will not win or make it by giving up. This is the only way out. Farewell, and Thank You for teaching me.

Fast Forward

2006-08-13T06:28:00.000-07:00

To all the youths of yesteryear, how many of you have regrets about the way you've spent your teenage years. For some, the spurned chances to score with chicks and for others, the neglecting of certain aspects of your lives, all of which have come back to haunt you.

Yes, in this hustle and bustle city, everything moves in fast foward mode. Where everything is quantified. Where are your As ? Where are your goals ? Where are you placed in the so-called dog race ? Yes. Everyone of you would probably be facing such dilemmas in your life at one point of another ? The question is, what is YOUR response ? Well, some, your's truly included, have taken what your's truly defines as the 'prospective path.' This path would mean that one would always be forward looking and aiming towards the future. Yes, often, we look so far ahead and work towards some unreachable ideal that we just neglect the present.

The question now then is, why are we such forward looking people ? Perhaps, this could be put down to a enigma in which, we could actually be extremely unsatisfied with our current situations in life and the way we choose to deal with it would be to work towards some kind of ideal situation in which everything would be better. Well, this could be deemed now as an 'escapist' approach to life. For the benefit of the tons of students now who have stumbled upon this most exalted of blogs, 'escapist' could be defined as one who runs away from problems. And to all students who deem it fit to try to intepret this article as not doing your work and just living for the moment, you're wrong too, because the focal point of this article is not about enjoying life and living for the moment, but rather, one which asks us to face up to our problems. To take on even the hardest of problems head-on instead of waiting for another respite or even trying to contort your lives to pretend that the problems never existed(escapist theory).

Perhaps your's truly's nomadic existence serves to point out one problem. Often, his majesty is prone to making it seem as if everything else around is inferior or insignificant. Maybe, just maybe, the problem may lie him. It might be that the percieved bravado and courage taken to transplant his most royal self to another place, could actually be cowardice in being unable to face up to inherant root problems in his life.

To all you fans out there, his majesty has only one question for you, ARE YOU FACING UP TO THE PROBLEM PRESENTLY IN YOUR LIFE ?

Questions I dislike

2006-07-28T09:34:00.000-07:00

Here are some of the things that your's truly doesn't like being asked.

1. Is that a birthmark on your cheek ?

Isn't it obvious? What do u think it is, some battle scar ? Or maybe it there cause someone saw fit to stub his cigarette butt on my face causing it to scar. Or my personal favourite, a love bite since your's truly is idolized by gazillions of people.

2. When are you leaving ?

Ahh, it's ok the first or maybe second time you ask. After that, it gets irritating cause it just shows you don't really care. Anyway, your's truly would preferably like to leave alone in peace. Thus fulfilling the notion of your's truly as the 'wanderer.' By the way, its 5th Sept.

3. You look like someone I know.

Pfft. Whoever that is that resembles your's truly is lucky. No need to tell me that he resembles me. Why ? Because I couldn't give 2 hoots about who looks like me. Your's truly is too unique to be bothered with such fleeting comments.

4. Are you sure your surname is spelt Poa ?

Fuck you. Do you not think that 16 years of education has at least taught me to spell my own name ? The countless number of times one practices writing one's own name on the top of the one's assignment and stuff is testament to one at least being able to spell one's name in today's educational environment.

Your's truly will add on to it. Keep a lookout.

How many can you save ?

2006-07-27T08:19:00.000-07:00

Remember the story about the boy throwing the star fishes back into the sea ? Well, and the tale goes on about saying how a difference it made for the starfishes that got saved.

So just how many 'starfishes' can Mr Poa save ? Well, it'd be naive to think that in one term, that even an entity as outstanding as his royal majesty can even manage to throw them ruddy rascals back into the ocean. But, this will not be the lack of trying. Putting them 10 hour days, giving extra remedial and even putting my contact number on the line for all who need it. Just what is your's truly really trying to prove ?

Would it to make up for past misdeeds ? To blaze a trail of redemption ? If so, the nobility of throwing them starfishes back into the sea is tarnished. That feeling of loss is terrible when one sees so many others throwing away their lives. Dear students, you only have one life each....don't screw it up. But how many truly hear ?

His majesty, signing off.

Mr Poa

2006-07-03T05:25:00.000-07:00

Your's truly is officially one week into his new profession as a TEACHER ! haha, bloody hilarous. Quite the stressful experience I must say...but enriching nonetheless. Your's truly is out there making a DIFFERENCE !

Ironic that your's truly has been tasked to teach english, least of which, when his majesty last checked, hmmm, he didnt know or care 2 hoots about what a noun is or what the difference is between an adverb and verb. But never fear, with his royal majesty's immense penchant for the language and his tremendous apptitude for all things pertaining to the Queen's Language, it will probably be a walk in the park.

Interesting Fact
On friday, a pair of students stopped yours truly and asked if anyone commented that your's truly looked like some 'Pan Weibo,' honestly, your's truly has no idea who the hell that is, but if he is fugly, you can be certain that these 2 miscreants will be hunted down and put to detention or as the school calls it, 'PC'. Ahhh, how power corrupts. =)

Stay tuned all, for more interesting facts about Mr Poa.

His majesty, signing off.

2006-05-31T06:31:00.000-07:00

Beware the EVIL SCGS GIRLS !!!!!!!!!

http://studentssketchpad.blogspot.com/2005/07/evil-scgs-girl.html

Cameo Appearance

2006-05-17T05:59:00.000-07:00

In next month's issue, your's truly is making his debut appearance in Seventeen magazine, as part of the counselling team out there for the poor souls that require expert advice.

Qns: Which would you rather your girlfriend dump you for ? Another girl, or an inferior guy ?

Ans from your's truly: "A tough question, both of which sound rather painful, but if your's truly had to choose, he'd pick the girl. This is because, this way, your's truly can on one hand, console himself about the girl's lesbian tendencies, and on the other, reassure himself that her high standards in the male species has not been compromised."

Whoa, that was a rather tricky question in which most of the people if asked would give some bland and forgettable ans, BUT, then again, your's truly isn't exactly to be put together in the 'most of the people' category.

Once again, this is your's truly, signing off. To all the fans out there, don't forget to grab next month's issue of Seventeen !

His Royal Majesty: Icon

2006-04-18T07:31:00.000-07:00

Dear PTI.I have a crush on you back in OCS.May I know if you want to make friends with a gay person like me?Add me at ons2LT@hotmail.com on MSN.Regards

Well, your's truly prefers hot chicks much more to gay pals. But then again, gay guys do have lotsa hot chick friends....mmm. I dont mind extending my royal hand to accept another subject like you. =) Although it does sound rather fishy......must be someone jealous of me and trying to frighten me. Trevor perhaps ?

In other matters, to prove that your's truly has truly reached iconic status, yesterday, while his royal majesty was out reading his very important law notes at Starbucks, 2 heartlandish teen girls(they were speaking mandarin, a language not associated to the high and royal society that your's truly belongs in), were secretly taking pictures of yours truly with camera handphones. Truly sneaky, if it werent for the fact that they were saying 'kuai dian pai tha, tha hai mei you zhu yi,' yes, although your's truly might not seem to be acquainted with the language of plebians, he does possess a more than elementary grasp of the language of the lower classes. Hopefully those pictures don't turn up at some porn website where it won't do justice to yours truly's humongously large manhood.

In other matters, your's truly feels that in reality, law when stripped to its core, is basically the legitamisation of power. No wonder your's truly is going to be a lawyer. Power and your's truly go naturally together hand in hand.

The Poameister signing off.

V.I.P .

2006-04-11T07:53:00.000-07:00

On the 6th of May, Raoul is having his 21st at MOS and yours truly is invited. V.I.P that he is. Gonna be a smashing party.

On the 13th of May, Andre, is having his party at Cocolatte and once again, yours truly is invited, V.I.P.

Obviously the similarity in these 2 parties is that yours truly is the V.I.P.

Coming and Goings

2006-03-26T09:10:00.000-08:00

Yours truly is 21 ! For those who weren't invited or weren't able to come, too bad, your loss definitely. His royal majesty was as always, looking at his best.

Anyway, my bro's birthday party was a blast. Had him and his lil friends spin the bottle, definitely the highlight for him, getting straddled by a chick before getting it good. Nice to see that he's not the little wimpy nerd that we all thought he'd grow into.

As for other matters, your truly might actually have to stay back here for uni....even as we speak, yours truly is already keying in dreaded digits and keys for the NUS application form. Now seriously, God is really trying his darnest to throw your's truly's best laid plans into smitterens. Oh yes, and if you haven't already known, your's truly, if you already haven't known, is co-heading the committee for the young adults group at church. Definitely not good considering the fact that probably the most secular and decadent person is leading the camp...fantastic. I was told that the best servants for God are in the acronym FATSO(how insulting, but at least its easy to remember).

Faithful: Not very
Available: Probably, considering that yours truly only has an EXAM to sit for in May.
Teachable: It all depends on who's doing the teaching.
Spiritual: Negative
Obedient: We shall not even go there.

Ahh, not exactly the most confidence inspiring ain't it....hope none of the others notice it, wouldn't want to shatter their fragile trust and confidence in yours truly now wouldn't we. Have definitely gotta stop making decisions on the spot. But fret not all you Nicholics out there, yours truly will as always pull through.

Far Left and Far Right

2006-02-27T04:14:00.000-08:00

My years between 17-18 were filled with decadent parties and a whole lot of time getting wasted and thinking up schemes to 'get the goods.' 2 years later, your's truly chronicles some recent experiences with his wingmen of an almost forgotten era.

Wingman 1: Trevor Tan, aka T Tan the Man, 9 inch gun
Scene: At a lobby waiting for an acquaintance to come down

T Tan: You know Nick, (pause) what I hope to get out of my time in Uni ?
Poameister: I dunno, an education ?
T Tan: (Banging fist hard on table) No ! I wanna fucking fuck all the chicks. Every fucking night. (Banging table at the same time) I gotta make up for the fucking 2 years wasted in army. Oh man, I tell, its gonna be ONE FUCKING HELL of an adventure in Uni.
Poameister: Nice to know what 12 years of education has done for you.
T Tan: FUCK education, all I wanna do is FUCK.
Poameister: Amen to that. All the best to your future endevours.

Yes, army certainly has not changed the 9 inch gun. Now, he more ready than ever to go on the prowl. For T Tan, it is time to feed. Ladies beware.

**Disclaimer from T Tan(to prevent a lawsuit...all these future lawyers..)
*Trevor has been known to exaggerate for comic purposes. He is one of the funniest guys I know.

Wingman 2: Raoul
Scene: Cafe Iguana

Raoul: You know Nick, we're the same kinda persons, same background , education and all. Good people.
Poameister: Cheers to that I say. Here's a toast to many more years of friendship.
Raoul: Yeah, I guess thats why we don't hang out that often with the old crowd anymore, you know, we're gonna be important people, you and I, we're gonna be worth millions in the future! Can't afford to throw away our lives at this moment. The future is bright for people like us.
Poameister: I couldn't have put it better.

Yes, Raoul, the oldest friend I have, ever since kindergarten on that faithful first day of school.

Lil Poameister: (Boarding bus)
Lil Raoul: Hello, my name is Roaul, whats yours? Want to sit here beside me ?
Lil Poameister: ok.

There, my 1st ever friend. Lost contact for 4 years when your's truly was cut off from the world. And met the lecture hall at ACJC one fine day. Instant recognition. Nice. Amazing how he changed since then, the 'machine gunner,' master of 'cover the face and attack the base.' Now being all grown up and ambitious.

There you have it, the far left and the far right.

The Poameister once again, at your service

Rebirth: Freed

2006-01-29T09:44:00.000-08:00

Finally, truly freed from the shackles which were once bound so tightly. The same one which forced him far and away from his abode, his land, his compadres, and above all, his roots. Uprooted, he struggled to find a place. Difficult, for everyone guarded their spaces so ever tightly....

A stranger to a new land is not always taken kindly to. Suspicion and doubt clouds his every movement. Was running away the best solution? Nonetheless, its was a decision which could not be revoked upon. Turning back now would prove pointless. Branded as a traitor, acceptance would never be granted. Even if it was, scars would still remain.

Despair, anguish, pain which could not be seen from the outside flooded and coursed through his entire self. The intensity of which was so hot that even tears could not be coaxed out of the dry well. Meandering aimlessly through the desert. Alone.

A secret only he and he alone could carry. The burden so great that at times he almost buckled under its huge weight. It would not be fair to share this with anyone. It is something that he would guard till the end of time....even if it was burning and searing through him from the inside.

Slowly, he was accepted by the new community. Ties with the past were now severed almost completely....the only footpath back being you. He was now broken into a sad melancholic creature albeit still with a wicked sense of humour. The only thing which remained of the past.

' Such sad and tired eyes you have,' the others commented. The only window to the torment which lay beneath. 'You smile stranger, but your eyes look so dead.' The light was snuffed out the day he tore himself away.

I ask you, what use is a king with everything, but not a person to share it with. Yes, he snatched the throne, slayed the dragons, got all the treasure he desired for. But to what end ? At the end, to find that you had left. The castle being devoid of all the spirit and life that you once brought it. Had he known this would happen then, he would have rather become a peasant and continue to rear chickens and plant vegetables with you. But ambition consumed him and all he wanted was fame and glory.

You were the only one who could make his heart stop. His tongue go mute. His eyes light up. And yet, you took his silence for the lack of chemistry, his fawning eyes as pointless. I guess then, it should already have been clear that it was over. And yet he chose to wave it off, cast it aside as if nothing had ever happened. Some things once gone can never be replaced. That much ought to have been clear to him of all people. This was something doomed to failure from the start. Especially with one as proud as him.The fact that you once chose to give him up for another could never and would never be forgotten. Especially to a specimen as inferior as that. The assurances you gave him before you left with 'it' were taken as lies, much as he would have liked to believe afterwards. He tried to forget, but it wouldn't go away. Not Then, Not Now, Not Ever.

Time really has numbed down the pain. While not being wholely integrated by the new communities that he had join in, he was accepted. Thats good.

One day, by a chance conversation, he found out that she was going to a land far far away for perhaps a long time, perhaps even forever. If he was to be assured that he was truly freed from the past, he would have to face up to this bane of his.(if you ever come across this and recognise yourself, yours truly would certainly have you know that in no way can u be described as a bane in any sense of the word. Its a personal thing.)

And so we met.

Time has really changed us all. Yesteryear barely seems like yesterday. Yet the one difference lies in the fact that he is no longer tied to the bonds of yesteryear. Relief coursed through his veins. Finally. A closure. I never thought that this day would come, nor did I imagine it.

Nonetheless, if I had to relive my life again, I would still make the same choices. I have found strength within me that I never thought was there. Exposure to a different world. Meeting people which I would never have otherwise met.

The memories will always remain with me, for it reminds me that the most precious things that we hold, are often the most fragile ones. Adios my old friend, may you always stay happy. (Or at least, as happy as you ever can be, no one can be always happy, unless you're on drugs, even then, induced happiness can't really be counted can it.)

Quote of the day: 'The most precious things that we hold are often the most fragile ones.'

By who else other than his most royalest highness, the Poameister. *grin*

His Majesty's 21st Birthday

2006-01-22T06:29:00.000-08:00

It is by his royal decree that on his majesty's 21st birthday, 21 people will be invited to dine with him at Secret Garden.

The best pick-up line ever

2006-01-09T06:44:00.000-08:00

Proof of just how easy it is to pick up chicks at MOS.....your's truly for the 1st time in his life got picked up by a chick....really, the lines they come up with.....obviously someone needs more practice....

Girl: Hi
Poameister: Yes ?
Girl:(moving really close to Poameister) erm....do you know where is the exit ?
Poameister:(obviously amused) Its over there.....
Girl:(sidling up close to the Poameister, so that his royalest arm can be put around her) I mean, where's the 'other' exit ?
Poameister:(getting irritated) I have no idea what you are talking about lady......
Girl: (whipping out handphone) Anyway, whats your name ?

No need for you all to know how it ended....your's truly does not appreciate dumb chicks..... =)

But its good affirmation that your's truly is a seexxxxy babae.....and just what a great honour it is for anyone to be graced with my presence.

Until then, This is the Poameister, signing off .

Personaility survey of yours truly

2006-01-03T19:19:00.000-08:00

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion		70%
Stability		70%
Orderliness		10%
Accommodation		30%
Interdependence		30%
Intellectual		30%
Mystical		36%
Artistic		23%
Religious		70%
Hedonism		43%
Materialism		63%
Narcissism		70%
Adventurousness		83%
Work ethic		43%
Self absorbed		56%
Conflict seeking		43%
Need to dominate		56%

Romantic		70%
Avoidant		70%
Anti-authority		76%
Wealth		76%
Dependency		63%
Change averse		56%
Cautiousness		36%
Individuality		76%
Sexuality		70%
Peter pan complex		50%
Physical security		90%
Physical Fitness		77%
Histrionic		70%
Paranoia		70%
Vanity		76%
Hypersensitivity		63%
Female cliche		36%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

A survey of your's truly. Fairly accurate, but that's cos u have to input so much data in....nothing new.

Tales of Amelia and Shuhui: Return of BO

2006-01-02T05:19:00.000-08:00

BO, short for Beverly Oh Zhao Lan, a real poor soul with a terrible nickname, was back from UK on her christmas break. Personally, yours truly feels that BO is really 'jolly good' company. Everything livens up when this fantabulous lady is around. Even her mother is cool. Mich(her mother), got us on the guestlist on MOS, bloody brilliant, as you know, normal plebians have to like queue for hours just to get in, for us, by proxy to knowing this super VIP, got to get in through the VIP entrance(a real ego booster, only thing missing was the red carpet treatment...). Inside, this hot mama got us like a ton of drinks. Truly first class company. Mich, is officially, the 'coolest friend's mother' of mine now.

New Year's Eve at Sentosa was arguably the worsest way to usher in the new year. Plenty of banglas there making a nuisance of themselves, trying to get fresh with all the girls and putting them naturally on the defensive. Obviously, these creatures have been saving up the entire year for this event, those that can't save enough probably went to downtown east or some free countdown event to try to grind the girls there. BO however was nonetheless trying her best to liven things up and was trying to dance despite the dark side's tremendous spheres of influence. Such an optimistic girl. MS will be lucky to have her. Pity she leaves next week.

In other news, Shuhui has been really busy with her new fling, for obvious reasons, lets just name him F. She 'picked' him up at MOS, a really not bad place for picking chicks up, or in this case guys.....certified by yours truly. No details here as yours truly believes in keeping such info to himself. Meanwhile, Amelia, still is embroiled in her semi-quasi relationship with J, your's truly has a bet that she will get hitched by Feb(Valentines day ?), and that MS will get hooked up with BO come Aug, maybe even on national day !!

Everyone seems to be having their fair share of love, except yours truly(dammit), rather frustrating one feels that there is no one even remotely significant in the romantic sense for yours truly. Obviously, there is no one even special enough to warrant any attention from his royal highness. A truly fucked up december in this sense.

Yours Truly, signing off

Itsy bitsy stuff

2005-12-10T09:43:00.000-08:00

A multitude of things have happened over the past few weeks.....ok, maybe not a multitude to you, but it is to me, of whom life is so nice and slow-moving and smooth.

First up, ah ma is dead.....her death scene was a tad too theatrical for me, seeing everyone weeping and being so sad(not that they've been particulary caring about her, some at least, not all), obviously, his royal highness controls his emotions very well, and isn't it said that when you die, you go to heaven ? Much better place than here I reckon.....obviously, ah kong is trembling up there and quaking in fear that ah ma will once again abuse him.....honestly, throughout all the violence and abuse, your's truly can swear that a funny kind of love shines through.....its really a kind of companionship you know, at least they bother to squabble and fight(really fight, with brooms and umbrellas, like some 3rd rate soap opera). Anyway, your's truly, on account of his greatness amongst his generation(not a very hard thing to do...), was chosen to give an eulogy about his grandma. It was rather funny, and as light-hearted as your's truly could give, mostly about rotans and canes.....

Another interesting snippet was that my other grandma after her last operation recently is really looking good. Even spoke to me(1st time in 2 yrs she actually has a conversation with anyone).....me thinks its because of me being the favourite grandson and all, she even agreed to my mother about being brought to church when she gets better. A true act of God. Just like how she was brought back to us all those years ago. Maybe she in her gong gong subconcious state actually could feel the influence of God on her.....now that would make me an even more favouriter grandson, seeing how I was the one who prayed to God and agreeing to believe in Him if she was brought back. Am such a filial person. =)

Today was Janis' wedding, really happy for her that she's found someone who's so willing to do whatever it takes just to make her happy. Someday, some lucky girl will also have me doing whatever it takes to make her happy. Hah ! We'll have pretty children too, Wyatt if its a boy and Alethia if its a girl(she can choose the chinese names). Amelia Tan(former classmate of the great one) thinks that your's truly should get a girlfriend soon, and make her happy with all my wonderfulnes, instead of writing this blog for all my fans out there.....selfish one she is.....but quite right, if I had a significant someone, I wouldn't have the spare time to write all my terribly witty and deep articles about me anymore. I'd obviously be spending more time with that lucky someone and if not, probably be thinking of how best to brighten up that lucky someone's day, although since she has me, everyday is a bright day, so correction, it shld be a brighter day for that lucky someone ! In case all you fans out there are wondering, your's truly has not met that lucky someone yet. Because your's truly believes in the 'thunderbolt' theory whereby meeting that special someone is akin to being hit by a thunderbolt and that it'd be so obvious that there was no way to deny attraction. Obviously, yours truly is a diehard romantic who believes at love at first sight, otherwise, why bother getting married to your 'best friend' just because you don't want to get lonely and you feel that that person is the best choice that you'd ever meet. The key here is the word 'best choice', whereby hinting that one had never actually loved, otherwise, there wouldn't be a 'best' choice, but instead, the 'right' choice.

Quote of the day: 'Untold love is the quickest way to a heavy heart.' (by the great one obviously)

Until then, ciao !

The Return of His self-proclaimed Majesty

2005-11-24T07:22:00.000-08:00

16 days, 15 nights..........spent in the wilderness of the serene, aka, shithole that is brunei....yours truly will not go into details here, there aren't enough expletives to describe the loathe I feel towards the lovely country.

Luckily, yours truly had the company of a certain few individuals which made the 16 days livable......There are a few highlights, such as being ferried around in a helicopter and sitting on an assault boat zipping to and fro.....

Needless to say, insects were swarming around the area, biting anything and everything, a whole range of new kakas were introduced to his royalest highness. Ants the size of thumbs and beatles the size of rats crawled around, plus the addition of like a million small cockroaches flying about definitely helped make Lakiun Camp the 5* camp that everyone loves.

R&R was a total blast, the acclaimed programme being the M&M(mosque and museum). Malls were nothing more than a supermarket, one feels that even Roxy Square is by far superior.... Only good thing was that pirated stuff is damn cheap....don't think those bruneiens evn know what originals are.....pirated stuff flying all over the place.....pity we couldn't buy them..

Never felt so happy to be flying back to singapore....Viva Singapura !

Forgive the disjointedness of the article....brunei i swear dulls the brain and just about everything else......

21st Birthday Party

2005-11-04T08:09:00.000-08:00

His royal highness comes of age next year on the 5th of March.

By his Royal Decree, there will be a ball organised in his name.

Dress Code: Formal

Venue: T.B.A

Guest List is being drawn up now.

A work of art. Version 1.02(some glitches ironed out)

2005-11-01T08:48:00.000-08:00

This is yours truly's personal statement to the UK unis. A real work of art. Can smell the UK air already. Updated version....the last one was too pro-poameister and too little substance on the whole.......some glitches have been rectified, please all who read this work of art comment on any mistakes or ways to improve this almost perfect masterpiece. Regards

I believe that law is a value system imposed by society on society. It is ever evolving, as it strives to reflect a society's beliefs on how its people ought to behave and sets respective boundaries in which its members are expected to confine themselves to. Law in my opinion is essential for the creation of any society in that it creates a set of guidelines needed for any form of civilisation to occur. It is the core in which society is formed and hence, reflects the level of development that a society is at. This is obvious when taking into account how deeply religous and conservative nations adopt religious material such as the Bible or the Quran as law. I believe that law truly reflects a society and that one can define a society by taking into account its laws. As society progresses, draconian laws limiting the rights of its citizens will be abolished as new laws emerge to give rise to the educated masses. This would be obvious when taking into account an example such as UK, where the legal system has evolved from a monarchic regime in which the monarch's word was law, to the one now where laws are implemented by a fully elected legislature. Hence, it is clear to me that as a society evolves into one which is more educated and liberal, the balance of power shifts accordingly towards the masses, thus embodying the ideal of a democracy.

As such, it is with these beliefs that I feel that law and leadership go hand in hand, qualities which I feel I possess. In school, I have been appointed in various positions of leadership, from being a vice-captain of the badminton team, to being in committees organising various school events. In the army, I too have been placed in a position of leadership, that of being a Physical Training Instructor at Officer Cadet School.

As lawyers, future upholders of the law, moral fibre and integrity play a very important role in ensuring that justice is served and that the masses are not exploited. I am a Christian by faith and firmly believe that one's principles ought to be upheld at all times and never compromised. I participate actively in church and am a Sunday School Teacher for children. To me, it is a great joy to be able to take such an active role in moulding young lives and to try to imbue in them principles that I hope will be useful for them in their lives.

Apart from this, I believe that I also have the drive to succeed as a lawyer. Currently, on top of my army commitments, I am also taking a part-time law diploma at a private school. This diploma is a correspondence course recognised and equivalent to the first-year of the University of London degree. Although this has almost all of my free time, I am grateful for the opportunity, for it has ignited a passion within me with regards to reading law. The modules I am taking are that of Contract Law, Public Law, Common Law, as well as Criminal Law. What so far facinates me most is that of Public Law and Common law as they both serve as essential platforms with regards to understanding other facets of law. One part of Public Law which I am especially interested in is that in the area of the separation of powers with regards to the executive, legislature and judiciary. It is interesting to note how in this respect, reality falls so far from theory, and that despite this, the UK system continues to be able to able to regularly dispense out a high level justice.

I have many various hobbies, most of them related to sports, soccer being my favourite. Reading, is also one of my passions and I read across a variety of genres, from thrillers, to science fiction, and also on current affairs. I am confident that I will be able to settle down successfully, aided with the wide-ranging and vibrant activities that your university is reputed for. With this I conclude, and I await eagerly for your favourable response

How not to be favourable....tsk tsk..........hahahahaa !!!!!!

Jumbled up Experiences

2005-10-30T05:31:00.000-08:00

Story 1
Place: OCS Stadium

Your's truly was conducting a normal run of the mill IPPT when this incident occured, much to the amazement and amusement of your's truly.

Officer:(Plucking a leaf ) U know what is the meaning of this ?
Cadets: No Sir !
Officer: This is a good luck charm, when I pluck this all of you will run faster.
Cadets: Yes Sir......
Excuse me.....but what bomoh skill is going on ? Since when will a leaf make one go faster? The army is messing around with people's minds I tell you. Am glad I am gonna be out in may. =)

Story 2
Place: OCS Gym

Colonel: I want the tvs mounted on the wall to be moved 6 inches down
PTI: The tvs are mounted.....cannot be moved
Colonel: But i strain my neck when i watch tv and run
Chief PTI: yes sir ! The TV will be moved down, I will notify the contractors to come as soon as possible.....

The things people do when they think they're big shots.......tsk tsk.....abuse of power me thinks....

Warcraft 3

2005-10-24T05:13:00.000-07:00

All along, your's truly used to sneer at the geeks hiding behind their computers while macho men like me went about busy with our very manly activities. Maybe that's why your's truly is computer illeiterate.....

Today marks a new turn in this chapter. The computers in the office have all been Warcraft-ised, and the merry gang hard at work polishing up our battle skills and refining our strategies. Ironically, all of us are also first-timers in Warcraft.....once again showing that we are all neanthadals in disguise....imagine....everytime something minor happens to the computers all of us immediately hit the panic button and call the IT folks in...maybe that's why they don't pick up our calls nowsadays. Of course, we wouldn't like any of you inferiors out there to acutely point out our flaws in front of us, which is why I prefer to term ourselves as alpha males. Yes, that infinitely sounds so much better than neanthadal.....although I wouldn't mind carrying around a club to knock any hot chick unconscious so I could bring her back to my cave....hmm...on hindsight, that'll never ever happen to his great one, his royal highness, machismo personified.

Maybe this also explains why we all like to pick characters that are basically maulers and head bashers. Nick Lim was using Pudge, a fat pig, much to the merriment of the entire team....your's truly, as always used the majestic Thor......At least, mine is handsome and at any rate, doesn't look like a pig.

We're all begginers....highlight of the day......killing Tam's hero 1 time ! A bit pathetic, I know, considering he murdered us about 20+ times....each. One feels that maybe that sly one purposely allowed himself to be killed so that we could go home....lol. But its a start. Soon we'll all be experts and be thrashing all comers.

In other matters, the Poameister often gets negative feedback about the YAG(young adults group) at church. This is HIS STAND. The Poameister feels very comfortable with the present situation, although, it is usually very boring....almost lulling his royal majesty to sleep at times. But that's just the way I like it when it comes to church. Nice and non-controversial. No running around chasing people to come join church(i like a certain exclusiveness......), and neither does the entire congregation feel obliged to go 'sha la la la la' during service. Am very comfortable with this laid back attitude. And neither is there any pressure whatsoever to maintain a certain attendance percentage and all. I think that this church basically leaves all such triviliaties to the individual, and yours truly likes this arrangement as the church is supposed to be a channel in which one communes with God.

Once again, this is your's truly, signing off.

Jungle Book part 1

2005-10-18T05:53:00.000-07:00

Jungle:Pulau Tekong

If by now, any of you have the misconception that the jungle is a nice place filled with flora..you have been fooled......

No doubt, all those army advertisements show courageous soldiers prowling effortlessly in the dense vegetation must have contributed to the myth that the jungle is a nice place.
P.S They're probably scratching their mosquito bite filled backsides when the camera is not on them.

Add to the fact shows such as LOST, where everyone seems so nice and clean in the jungle. Ever wondered why none of them ever got any insect bites ? Or that they always seem so nice and clean-shaven....funny how the chicks in the show never sprout any armpit hair....considering that they're angmohs, a.k.a 'hairy people'. Jack's hairstyle is always the same each episode....and if left to nature, Sayed would probably resemble a monkey.

The truth: There are tons of creepy crawlies in the jungle. There is also lotsa mud and grime....in fact, most of the jungle is mud. About a million mosquitos. Now, why is only now that your's truly is complaining about the jungle ? Surely, he, who has been in the army for such a long time would have known this from the start......Well, yesterday, your's truly went back to the dreaded island of Tekong once again for a river crossing exercise. In my opinion, a bloody waste of time. That said, its been quite some time now since yours truly had to actually camp outfield, hence, as they say, outta sight, outta mind. Definitely brought back a plethora of bad memories. Just the other day, yours truly was wondering if he made the right choice in taking the road less travelled by becoming a PTI instead of going to OCS. Well, your's truly had forgotten why the hell he had rejected in the first place going to OCS while in SISPEC and scheduled for a cross-over........he HATED the JUNGLE. Yesterday truly reminded him of the CORE reason why he didn't want to cross over and instead fought so hard to get himself admitted into the PTI course....albeit rather underhandedly.....

Ever wondered why in the commercials all the river crossings are done at night ? The army would like you to think that its because of tactical reasons....yours truly however feels that this is so because the water in rivers are usually brown. Like milo......if you're lucky, the water is moving....if not, there's a layer of oil on top of the water and dead insects are floating all over. And hence, here is where you see the truth.

Case Study 1: Always shake your shoes/boots in the morning before you put them on. That is the rule number one, assuming one actually takes off his footwear while sleeping out in the wild...your's fully puts on everything...always better to have one more layer of defense. LTA Eric Neo(Guards) obviously doesnt think so....Probably complacency setting in there....Afterall, Guards are known to repel down helicopters and like to see themselves as being one of the elite fighting forces that the SAF has. Being the man of steel that he is, Eric didnt bother shaking the boots....afterall, even creepy crawlies know better than to crawl inside the boot of a guardsman ! Obviously, one big red centipede did not bother about this and duely made the boot his abode for the night. The rest they say is history, man puts feet into boot, man gets bitten by centipede, man goes to hospital, man gets 5 days mc. LOL, on hindsight, one must point out to the fact that the centipede was RED....the colour of Commandos, hated rivals of the Guards. Anyway, the centipede was burned to death by LTA Eugene(ARMOUR) , figures.....armour includes all the tanks and artillery...lotsa bombing....and so, the centipede was burned to death, one actually gets on a sadistic high while watching the centipede squirm and twitch in pain as it is slowly burned to ashes. Heh, that oughta teach those pesky creatures not to bother humans anymore.

And so, 30 over mosquito bites later, yours truly is reminded that the jungle is not a nice place. This is the Poameister, signing off !

Anoymous

2005-10-16T07:39:00.000-07:00

To all annoymous people out there: Please stop putting comments on my blog as to how to make money !!!! I certainly will not need your mindless schemes as to how to make 'millions.' I already know I will be a multi-millionaire next time. This is the true fool-proof way of getting rich. Ready for it ? Yes, it is to get a RICH WIFE/HUSBAND ! See, I already have my way of making millions. So I certainly will not need your help, thank you very much. Ah, another point, I'm also going to be a lawyer, so at any rate, I doubt I shall need much financial assistance from you of all people......you're annoy-mous.....annoying me at any rate, and my fans as well....those that read the comments....

Anyway, there are many selfish people around yours truly.....all secretly cursing me behind my back so that I wouldn't be able to go abroad for their own selfish reasons. Etc, oxy on hearing that my LNATs went rather badly clapped and said 'yay, now u're going to stay in singapore....even worse, Sharon just went ' yay, now you can get a car and ferry me all around singapore !' Terrible !!!!

Yours truly would sincerely like to remind all that love is noble and love is in giving, not recieving. So no matter how much all of you fans love me out there, please allow yours truly to be able to go with a carefree heart, instead of pondering and worrying about all of you.

This is the Poameister signing off !

Majulah Singapura

2005-10-12T05:23:00.000-07:00

The LNATs were rather tough. Damn Brits, can't they be nicer like their Aussie counterparts.....just accept the cash and no questions asked. 40 mins for an essay is definitely too short....especially for someone as verbose as yours truly. Hopefully, your's truly will do well enough to get himself out of this shit-hole. Otherwise, its marjula Singapura !!! NUS uglies, NTU Fuglies.....here I come.....terrible.....

Ah well, at least your's truly had the captivating Miss Bian for company for lunch today. Apple Pie as usual. Sweet yet airy. (Am refering to both here.) She thinks that the interesting life of your's truly is made up....blasphemous of the great one she is....tsk tsk.

aH~! The CSM is leaving for england !! Hurray hurray !!! Let all anarchy and mayhem break free from its shackles. Am going to write a poem here. If he should get news of this, he must know that I love him all the same and I wish him all the best !

Setting forth to lands unknown,
with all our hopes on his back.
Ever steady, he marches on.

Pack your bags !
Bid farewell !
For yappy is heading north.
To lands seemingly unknown,
Hail the Queen!
Yippy Yippy! Yappy's Going !

Let the walls break down,
for when the cat is not around,
the mice come out to play !

Come at ten, go at four.
Here's the life we've all been waiting for.
Unshackled we will emerge.
LET ANARCHY BREAK FREE !

Our time has come,
this we will savour.
Victory is sweet.
We are free !
We are free !

The Centre of the World

2005-10-09T08:21:00.000-07:00

It has been brought to the attention of your's truly in recent times, issues regarding your's truly being overtly self-centred/self-consumed.

X, an old friend or more appropriately termed as acquaintance, commented a few weeks back that deep down inside, your's truly was still the nic that existed then. Till today, X is the only person which has come through/found a way to the core and yet, left. In actual fact, one actually feels that she is right. Is the enigma now that all the world is privy too merely a shell ? Albeit a very interestingly crafted and designed shell. One can actually confess truthfully, that this shell was actually created perhaps as a barrier or protection. It's amazing actually....how she can actually almost telepathically pierce through everything each time. Ironic really, seeing how we've not met for the best part of 4 years, and yet she still knows. Even more ironic that your's truly cannot even fathom even to the slightest degree who or what X is......

My future Family

2005-10-04T07:36:00.000-07:00

Your's truly has just finished a tour of other lesser blogs. Am proud to say that once again, this blog is rated by me as THE most entertaining blog around. Only here can one find sophisticated literature(read the green eyed monster) as well as excellent articles which are laced with dry wit. In fact, yours truly is not going on another tour in the near future. All that angst....people nowsadays dont know what to appreciate what they have.......although on hindsight, yours truly could be 10cm taller, put on 5 more kg of muscle mass, be smarter, richer and oh yes, have a super duper hottie for a girlfriend. Would be perfect if she was rich and smart at the same time. Now look, there you see, lotsa desires and angst, albeit put across in a light hearted way. If everyone adopted this style, blogs would be infinitely more interesting and far less depressing.

Back to the topic, 'THE FUTURE' (cue for trumpets), Your's truly has taken the liberty of naming 2 of his 3 kids already. Preferably, your's truly would prefer the oldest to be a girl, followed by twin boys. The girl shall be named Alethea. Now, thats such a pretty, sophisticated and princessy name. One of the boys shalt be given the name Wyatt. Ah , thats a nice and strong name. Lotsa energy coming out of that name. The last name would of cos be decided by my wife/mother of the children, whichever is applicable. She can also pick the names of the other children, if she's up for it. Oh, all chinese names will be decided by her too. Preferably using easy words so that the father of the children wouldnt forget or worse, not know how to write it in the first place. If left up to me, it'd probably be pan yi , pan er, and pan san. Sharon suggested pan cake. But thats not funny, she's an idiot. Making fun of my future names for my children.

Ah, as for my future spouse, or even girlfriend, here is a list of criteria. (very difficult to meet)
Physical Attributes
1. Super nice features: Sharp nose(enuff to even cut butter). Nice eyes(not too big). Eyes should be expressive, able to show a wide range of emotion....not the dead kind. Porcelain complexion(i.e. better than mine) In all, a fairly symetrical face(defined by aristotle as beauty). One more thing, ears should not be sticking out like an elephant.
2. Height: Should not be less than 1.58m. Yes, I must admit now tt I am not the tallest of men, but thats why I want the future mother of my kids to be tall. So my kids have a 50% chance of being tall.
3. Figure: Should not weigh more than me. Preferably without flab.
4. Race: Mix bloods would be most preferable.

Personality:The absolute most important one as well as the category where most people fail to meet up the mark. Her personality must as unpredictable as the British Weather. Vibrant, lazy, passionate, icy, fierce, meek and all the different dichotemies that one can find. Stability is out. People think I am crazy to want this, but it would be rather boring if everything was all fine, dainty and predictable. I want someone to not only bask lazily together with me on a fine summer day, but also one that will laugh maniacally at the storms approaching and ride it out with me. Yes, this pletora of conditions will probably never be met. I for one have only met 1 person that actually beared any resemblance to this......

External Factors
1. Wealth: It would be nice not to have to worry abt material needs, although if she did possess the above mentioned personality or physical attributes, I wouldn't mind working all day to put food on the table

In my humble opinion , your's truly will probably never meet anyone like that.
Cheryl and company is waiting with bated breath at the day I have a girlfriend and to see if she actually meets up to the requirement. She asked once that since love is blind, one will not be able to choose or even predict what one would end up with. However , I told her that this was totally wrong and used circular reasoning to disprove her. Here goes, Poameister likes girls with above mentioned qualities, girls w/o above mentioned qualities would not attract the Poameister. See ! Circular in everyway.

Anyway, anyone who finds someone fitting into the above mentioned criteria please inform me. This is his royal highness, signing out.

The Green Eyed Monster

2005-09-23T21:17:00.000-07:00

Beware the green-eyed monster,
its presence seemingly evanescent.
But neither be fooled nor taken in,
for it is deceptive, patient and omni-present.

Beware, for its bids its time.
Waiting for an opportune moment.
Steathlily it will strike.
Slinking around in the corners.
Patiently chipping away.

Beware, for soon there will be no escape.
It eats away in your innards.
Chipping away at your resolve.
Overwhelming, Overpowering.
Blinding you, as it takes control.

I beseech you dear reader,
do not take lightly my words of caution.
The Green-Eyed Monster most definitely exists.
Take heed, take heed.

Another wonderful piece of work from the Poameister.

Julienne's Pao and Maggie Mee

2005-09-04T08:19:00.000-07:00

Your's truly had a chance encounter recently with the charming and petite Julienne, on his way back to his royal abode. To mark this rare occasion, seeing that we both live on opposite ends the islands, she decided to tell me her favourite joke/icebreaker. Really interesting lady...that one.....lol.

Julienne(while eating a pao): I love paos! Btw, Have you heard about the joke about pao and mee ?
Poameister: No.....whats it abt ? Tell me ?
Julienne: Are you sure ? *giggles.*
Poameister: Just tell me la woman !
Julienne: Once, there was a big fat white round pao, one day, mee was fed up with nice fair pao and went up to it and punched him. Angry, pao gave chase ! But, owing to obesity, pao was soon lost far behind......hee hee....can you imagine a pao running ???
Poameister: u mean bounce ? yes, plenty of bouncy fatties in the army. hyuk hyuk !
Julienne: HAHA.....anyway, pao was very flustered and angry. He swore to take revenge on that yellow and cowardly mee. The next day, pao spotted maggie mee from afar. Sneakily, pao crept up slowly from behind....hahahahaha, can you imagine a pao trying to sneak up from behind ??? hahahaha.
Poameister: I can only imagine......quick finish it....
Julienne: Yes yes. And then, pao, when within striking distance, whack's maggie mee on the head and said " Just because you permed your hair doesn't mean I don't recognise you !"

****disclaimer. Julienne's words have been slightly altered here, but even she agrees that the essence of it is the same. =)

*At this moment, both of us burst out in laughter. Julienne amused by her own joke...and me amused by her. Such an interesting girl, Julienne is....haha.....plays the bass guiter too. Rocker chick this one. Now just why such eligible girls remain without quality boyfriends just confounds me......once again proving my theory that most of the guys in our country are sadly inferior in terms of charm, looks and an overall enthusiam for life(guys here are obsessed with dota...whatever that is....yours truly does not keep in much contact with the regular plebians and proletariats...). Some guys just....don't....geddit..... =)

Once again, my fans, its is time for yours truly to turn in for the night/morning......so once again, gd morning everyone! And in case I don't see you, gd afternoon, gd evening and gd nite ! This is the Poameister, signing off.

Tales of Amelia and Shuhui (part 2): Mr Below Average

2005-09-02T08:23:00.000-07:00

Just earlier this week during BO's farewell dinner, Amelia got a call from Mr Below Average, asking her out on a date.......

Here's a description of Mr Below Average

Poameister: Is he good looking ? Rich ?

** Julienne almost pukes whatever she is eating. Shakes head furiously.

Amelia, when confronted said. "Average looking I guess, just average all round.....but now that he likes me....I think he's below average....his dress sense is CMI, the jeans are way too short, meaning I can see his socks. WHY NICK ? WHY DON"T DECENT GUYS LIKE ME !" When yours truly replies that one shouldn't lower one's standards, she replies " hmm.....I guess you are right, but still ! I don't want to be left on the shelf....sometimes thats very scary. Its like all your friends are getting married and you're all alone....." Deep thinker Amelia is, thinking of such profound things which are light years ahead. Truly ahead of her generation.

Poor girl's traumatised by this entire episode.....Mr Below Average asked her out for lunch today and tried to give her a massage.....really grossed her out. Even grossed me out...haha

If this keeps up, your's truly may have to offer himself as a make-believe boyfriend. Just to keep these pesky flies away from the flowers. Only sweet honey bees please......everything just get lost ! The Venus Poatrap is here to get rid of all unwanted pesky desperate creatures. Your's truly seriously enjoys the suffering inferior people go through when they're rejected by people above their class level. Esp NTU guys.....Seriously don't like them.....I don't know why. Am just a prejudiced lil prick. No wonder no one wants me.......(figure of speech here. Not true at all)

Honestly, the number of girls who are eligible in S'pore far outweigh that of the guys. No wonder the girls are complaining......maybe this explains why the sex rate in Singapore between couples is going down all these years......despite studies showing that women in general are now pushing and demanding for more sex. Interesting....shall not elaborate any further on this.....you can refer to my previous articles for this topic.

Hence, concludes yet another episode of Tales of Amelia and Shuhui. Until then. Toodles. =)

Jessica Alba

2005-09-01T07:34:00.000-07:00

Sharon told me this week that 2 energy-crazed kids at Taka told her she looked like Jessica Alba. hahahaha. Must be some kids with valium or prosiac. Tsk tsk, the ease at which drugs are steadily available nowsadays.

Other news, CSM is back with a vengence........being seriously anal this few days.....really irritating the crap out of yours truly.....also, have been rather busy these few days.....am being piled with loads of work, no thanks to the fact that your's truly has been put in charge of all administrative work. Fuckin hell.

Met BO on tuesday, lucky girl's going back to UK to study. Spent 6 wks in Fiji diving.....all in the name of education......lol. Hopefully I'll be going there next year. Have to ask Ngoei for another testimonial...hmm.

Quote for you ' Iron is good for you !' Get the dual meaning ?? heh

Peacock.

2005-08-26T10:10:00.000-07:00

Other less significant news before the main serving. Yours truly now knows how to play mahjong. Courtesy of some old friends from secondary school. Only difficulty would lie in the fact that I cant recognise some of those ruddy chinese words.

Now, Peacock. For the rest of you less knowledgable plebians out there, Leslie Peacock(full name) was one of the contestants of the FHM girl next door competition a few months back. Certainly the favourite to win, a common opinion all of us at the PTI course had. Save for Elynn Toh, the girl with humongously round boobs who was Terrence Yap's ex(fellow trainee). A bit of a sympathy vote by proxy there one would guess.....also, after intense interrogation by the entire course, including the very famous/notorious Master Ong(now Warrant Ong)/Monkey God, he admitted to 'making the beast with 2 backs',(quote from othello, written by shakespere) with her of course.

Anyway, back to the topic, on Wed, yours truly accompanied by Ellyas went down to Zouk for an NUS business pageant in which a mutual friend, Gwenda Ailing(F1) was taking part in. One must comment now that the paucity of decent looking fellas in NUS is shocking...terrible ! No wonder the girls there are complaining. Most of the contestants put up were scrawny and well......ugly. And this is the supposed cream of the crop.....I shall refrain from all comments here in case yours truly by some stroke of cruel fate end up there. Have no intention of being crucified in the event that I actually have to stay here for an education.....luckily, there are no pictures of me here, so I at least remain annoymous to the casual reader.

Anyway, Ellyas introduced my to his group friends, all models and rather good looking I must say. Heard their very funny comments about their agent, crooked to the point of no return. 2 of them managed to easily sweep aside the competition in the open category of hunks and babes, opened to the entire floor. No big deal there....there wasn't even any semblance of resistance put up. Got the easiest 2 bottles of black label they will ever get.

And on the party went until.........who should pop up but peacock herself ! Was totally flabbergasted and was about to point out to Ellyas that my idol was standing right in front of me, only metres away. But before yours truly had the chance to do this, she came walking right up to us and wonders of wonders, she started having a conversation with Ellyas ! Imagine to my immense surprise when Ellyas introduced us.....Am absolutely delighted. Plus the fact that she was dancing with us later on in the evening, this is definitely the highlight of the month. Yours truly now can brag to all his friends(esp those in the PTI course) that he was once introduced to the lovely Leslie Peacock. Hah !

Poameister's People Rating System

2005-08-14T07:48:00.000-07:00

Finally, comes the long awaited article on just how exactly the Poameister rates people. Usually done on a scale of 10. This ought to like solve many of your queries on just how exactly I come to rate you or ur friends/aquaintainces/enemies.

Looks
Like it or not, one's looks do play a very integral role in how I rate a person. Nonetheless, it is not the most impt factor, as you will see later on in this article. However, as indication of how looks are important, I must tell you now that it makes up the base of the total score. This is due to the relative ease(in comparison to the other components) in which it can be implemented. Plus, since this system is applicable to all, it would only be fair to ppl I don't really know that I rate them accordingly to something which I can actually see.

Here's the breakdown.(done on an imaginary X)

Overall look and feel: Firstly, yours truly will decide on how a person looks based on an overall feel. For instance, X is given an overall rating of 7.8 .

**Now that we have an overall score and a base to work with, here is how the system works, for the looks department, once an overall look rating is done, we will proceed to the points deduction system. This means that yours truly will start deducting points frm the overall based on the flaws that he finds when he puts you under close scrutinity(hence, just because I stare at you, doesnt mean I like you....merely that I may be coming up with a score for you.)

Height: 1.75m(guys) 1.6m(girls) Above mentioned numbers are minimum requirements for me not to deduct points from the total. Points are deducted accordingly to how far one falls from the mark.

Facial Features: Everything that can be found on the face here is included and deducted from the total score respectively.

Body: Very impt for both. Flab and fat.....definite nonos. For guys, this can actually add marks instead to your total !! For girls, not too flat, or big for that matter. Once again, this might actually boost your final score.

Overall Looks Total: Once everything is deducted and added, your's truly, being extemely thorough will thus review everything to come up with a final score.

Personality+how much I like you

Unlike the looks test, this personality test is more subjective rather than objective. Hence scores tend to fluctuate. This component acts like this, its used as a demerit or bonus system and hence, the overall looks total + likability factor=final score. So, if I like you, I'll probably give you bonus with accordance to just how much I like u.

Bonus points
Things such as humour, generousity(to me), kindness do play a part. As a general rule, acquaintainces(of the hi and bye kind) get ard 0.5, for friends(the kind that I talk to abt superficial stuff) 1 pt, for very gd buddies 1.5 pts. For close family and super duper good friends(nt many) 2. So there, the max one can get is 2 pts.

Demerit points.
Unlike the bonus system, there is no limit as to how much I can deduct. This shows that I am not such a superficial chap afterall. I can actually not like good looking ppl ! =)
As a general rule....ah bengs are deducted so many pts that they go into the negative straight away. For ah lians, I usually give them a 0 in this compartment...because they are just so amusing......nt that they mean to be of course, hence the 0.

Final Score
After the adding/deducting of scores frm the likability factor to the looks factor, yours truly will do a last review of the score to make it just and fair to all.(Under POA standards of course)

How you might stand in this system.

The usual man and woman, aka pleibians, on the street usually gets around 3(for girls) and 2 and below for guys.
Friends are usually given 3.5 and above

Girls(relationship benchmarks) Guys(brudderhood benchmarks)
4.5 to 5.5 (Maybe) 4-5 (normal friends)
5.5-6.3 (Possibly) 5-6 (brudders)
6.5-7(Hopefully) 6-7 (Brudders for life)
7 and up(Definitely...) 7 and up ( Blood brudders)

Hope this has been helpful to all of you. Until then, this is the Poameister, signing off !!!!!

Rejection.

2005-08-11T09:12:00.000-07:00

Before I begin on the subject matter at hand, the topic above does not refer to me. No one rejects your royal highness.

Some of the coldest rejections I have experienced(not me, other ppl), range from the realm of pure entertainment, to that of pure freakiness.

Case Study 1. The Model
Ali F, a total stud-muffin, capturing the attention of all chicks(and ugly ducklings) from all over definitely ranks as one of my favourite all time rejections. Here was how he rejected his current squeeze in the beginning. Here I am talking about a perfectly hot chick, another model I would think. Many would think of him as being insane, however the manner in which he did it is just pure class. Here's the lowdown, hunky Ali (rhymes), having balls of steel(or maybe no balls), actually has the audacity to write a note stating 10 reasons why he did not want to get with this chick. Amongst one of these reasons is that of her not being a christian....mind you, ali here is no saint himself....plus the fact that she is hot...this is one guy that definitely doesn't follow the will of his other little but just as significant head. And he actually hands the letter to her personally. Definitely a 7/10 because of the uniqueness and sheer coolness in which he swats her away. Respect.

Case Study 2. The long melodramatic break-up
It begun with 17 page love letter.......it ended with an 18 page one. Some people really have issues......I mean.....how the heck does one even write 17 pages to another person.....mind you, this was done on A4 size and lined paper....all in all, definitely enough to write a book....not that it'll get published.....its probably a drag and definitely not as entertaining as all my articles. Definitely one of the freaky ones. Obviously doesnt love her as much as he hates her....literal interpretation of mine here....check the 1 page difference btw the love and break-up letter. Hilarious. =) Surely an 8.5/10 on the rejection scale....imagine the chick's feelings when she gets hit by 18 pages of how everything went wrong. Terrible.

Case Study 3. The naked man
Finally an interesting tale of how a girl rejects a guy. Its more of a natural progression I think, the way she avoided him and all. Why this makes it into the list is more because of the fact that he's been turned down numerous times.....0% success rate. Another factor is because of the way he thrives on baring his body to his targets. Albeit with little success. So I guess he's here because of the way he causes himself to be rejected ? Definitely entertaining, the way everyone snickers as he makes his move and prowls around the intended prey......a 6/10.

Case Study 4. The Shorty
This is why short guys are disadvantaged when it comes to the dating game. Society has always had this pre-occupation with that of the tall, dark and handsome. Some call them hunky dories, I prefer neanderthals. Some sour grapes there. But no matter, for none can compare to his royalest highest excellency. Was looking thru some of the drafts SH wrote today with regards for grounds of rejection. I quote 'you know I absolutely abhor guys shorter then me.' Obviously, the normal vertically challenged guy has a lot to do in order to keep up. Nonetheless, I give this a 6.5/10 on the rejection scale.

Case Study 5. The Jerk
Once upon a time a guy, J, got together with X in a semi-relationship. He then fell for her best friend and openly declared it. She was the last to know. She was usually the substitute whenever he got rejected by other girls. A real tear jerker here. Definitely ranks up there in terms of melodrama with all those korean serials. A definite 7/10 for the sour taste it leaves in the mouth.

Thats all for tonight folks. This is the Poameister, tuning off.

Tales of Amelia and Shuhui (part 1): My first time and snippets about J

2005-08-10T07:34:00.000-07:00

The long awaited part 1, episode 1, article 1, is here ~!!!!

Your's truly stayed over at this fantastic, dandy, fantabulous apartment on monday and tuesday. Here's a description of it, the gateway to the flat opens into this shoe lobby which incidentally looks like a lift but without doors. Stepping through it, one is presented with the living room which looks minimalist in nature and not overstuffed with furniture as many apartments are. The dining area is simply gorgeous, the walls and floor there being painted with a differnt colour frm the rest of the house. Alfresco like dining table and chairs. Beyond that is the entertainment room. Its glass walls are really a sight to behold and the decor inside is simply breathtaking. A sofa which can double up as a bed is really good for visitors and behind one of those walls actually hides a mattress. Deceptive, I love the designer already. Moving on to the rooms, they're are fairly normal, apart from the fact that one of the tiles from Amelia's bedroom is actually a window to the kitchen. Connected to her room is her own walk-in wardrobe, stuff that you only see in movies. This walk in wardrobe resembles a clothes boutique with areas catered towards clothes that should be hanged, T-shirts which can be folded, accesories and belts. Yes, this is just a brief overview of the house.

Coming to what happened during my stay. Prior to this, your's truly met Julienne, J for short, for a guided tour of NTU. Realised that it is horribly designed and terribly complicated. J for one only just found her way around her own art and design block last friday and realised that she's been alighting at the wrong bus stop resulting in many a long walk. Meet an old friend Annete, pretty eurasian girl, am sure she'll have a hard time swatting those irksome NTU guys away frm her. Same goes for J, noticed a few guys checking her out, no surprise, with her wonderful dress sense and all. Those beaded bracelets look gorgeous on her. Like all those nice skirts that she has too. Will have a blast in the future chronicaling all their failed attempts in pursueing this fair damsel. One feels that this person will need to be of a high calibre, for J is very much of an elitist. Evidence comes from her refusing to shop at Giant because it is 'smelly', plus the fact that she's came frm RJC and prior to that MGS....not your everyday neighbourhood schools aren't they. The guy probably also has to either want to join Campus Crusade or already an active member inside, due to the deep connection that our friend here has with it. *snicker.

Pity she didn't stay with us during this time, too popular already this girl, had prior arrangements to go out with friends on national day.

The stay was very fun, watched a few episodes of Sex and the City. Played truth or dare in which everyone lied. Especially like the part Sharon says she wants to be stranded on an island with Mr MP(mopeng)(totally hilarous.....gasp....what if she wasnt joking/lying...). Needless to say, no one revealed their deepest darkest secrets. Also realised that girls are totally crappy at playing Risk....in the end everyone joined the United Nations and had a continent each...rubbish. Whatever happened to WORLD DOMINATION !!!

Had hotcakes for breakfast...its been bloody long while since yours truly had a honest to goodness and wholesome macdonalds breakfast. Also played hide and seek in the surrounding blocks. Me and Shuhui, S, were so good at hiding that we freaked everyone out...esp amelia, who almost gave up and went home, Sharon, the twin gave up at the start, and made her way home...wimp.....lazy bum was already showering when we came back. Just today, we were having a conversation in which she let slip that her 'tums tums'(tummy) and arms were growing.....will have to get her back in shape soon. Went home after that, really tired and exhausted. Will be back there soon, stay tuned to this spot. Adios people !

A new direction.

2005-08-03T06:09:00.000-07:00

Yes, its been rather boring after all this while.....and one feels tt the life within this blog is waning. But fear not people, there will be a new direction from now on.

Starting up, yours truly has been cordially invited to stay over at a friends place. Really lucky girl, got her own flat at 19. One of the merits of being an only child in the family I think.....But anyway, Amelia(tts her name) and Shuhui/Bianca(her good friend and fellow eastie forced into NTU) have invited my to stay over whenever I want to. How exciting ! And it is from this that life will once again be injected.

Now, yours truly would like an opinion of which title would be appropriate to chronicle the happenings of this new development of my once again very interesting life. 'Snippets' ? Or maybe 'Tales of Amelia and Shuhui'.(adapted from the popular article from 8 days, Tales of Amanda and Saffy by Jason Hahn) I like tt, how glamourous to be invited to a hen's nest...or maybe chicks nest(they're nt tt old). Am popular. =). haha. Another title suggestion could be '2 girls, a guy and a HDB flat,' tt sounds a bit contrived don't you think ? Am open to suggestions, for once am opening a small part of this blog to all you fans out there.

Another question should be how often should I update this aspect of my blog.....hmmm....maybe fortnightly or even weekly if the demand is there. Am sure to have lotsa material. They are rather interesting people.(a brief overview in the next paragraph) Plus, all the other people that they've invited to stay over. Its going to be a circus out there. Juz hope Sharon comes over to stay soon.......she's good at cleaning up....or should I say, house maintanence.

Biopsis of the people you are likely to meet in the articles
Main Characters.
Amelia. Tai tai(sh) in nature, Amelia is the only child in the family. Currently reading Mass Comm at NTU, she is the proud owner of the flat. Is extremely fond of stolen ornaments to make her new house look more exclusive, etc, bus numbers, street names and whatever signs she can get hold of. Currently unattached.

Shuhui. Dainty girl who lives in her own world. Currently doing business at NTU. Loves wearing white tops. ( has a gazillion white tops with assorted prints). A permanent resident(PR) of the flat. Currently unattached.

Secondary Characters.
Sharon. The twin. Very domesticated, good at cooking and cleaning. Very fun-loving person albeit with a rather lame sense of humour at times. Currently working for seventeen magazine. Professional Thief(where amelia is going to get the bulk of her exclusive decoration from)Currently unattached(albeit with tons of suitors knocking on the doorstep...will they come up to this doorstep too?)

Julienne. Artistic girl who's in charge of the decor of the house. Currently doing art and design at NTU. A very glamourous and girly girl. Always immaculately dressed. Currently unattached(I think).

Mattias. All the above mentioned girls belong to Mattias' harem. Taking after his father as the major player in church. Needless to mention here whether or not he is attached.

Of course, new characters will be added depending on the entertainment value they bring to the article. One feels that these eligible girls will be constantly serenaded by the very desparate from NTU and all walks of life. As always, you can always count on a fully biased account from the Poameister chronicling the lives of those around him. Stay tuned to this blog ppl. This is the Poameister signing off.

The Room

2005-07-29T08:02:00.000-07:00

With someone(I shall not name who) leaving for some course in 2 wks time, now's the time to plan for a overhaul in the system. First up, new names for the office and meeting room.....sounds so mundane and boring. Any suggestions people.....maybe like War Counsel(inspired by Risk), or maybe Playstation(frm the new ps2 inside our office).

HOHO, am the undisputed champ of Tekken with my team of chickys. Haha. My chicks are undefeatable ! Esp the one chick to rule them all. the sexiest and hotest one.

Thrashed everyone at Need for Speed and Winning 11 also. Am the undisputed and great gaming expert. Plus master diplomat frm my ol' risk playing days.

Nothing interesting to report . Other den my new nick in church is hansom and also archie. hahaha.

Btw, keep having weird dreams abt someone this few days.....hope its nt my subconscious acting up. Am so over this shit......

Much ado about nothing

2005-07-27T07:03:00.000-07:00

yes yes, yours truly got scolded today over a trivial matter....hmph.

Life's been so slow-moving this couple of wks. so ya, nothing interesting to really write abt. Am once again trying to be nice to the people surrounding me......agape love. Which means unconditional love. *bleah. Wonder how long this is going to last......lol.....bet it won't last past the week......but the impt thing is I WILL TRY.....haha. tsk tsk.

I know one free carpark area near Gelare, thanks to my twin who kindly brought me along some mini obstacle course aside a big smelly drain. No problem to yours truly of course, was surprised at the dexterity my twin showed though......mountain chicken she is......or maybe longkang chicken, more appropriate. *Guffaws!

Apart from these....there have been no significant updates or insights into yours truly....especially now since i've decided to be a nicer person. Oh yes, my partner, Miss Ong/Cheah Xin Yi has so kindly abandoned me for the bus rally thingy to be with Mr Cheah.....definitely some black marks for this in my favourite people list. Now am partnered with someone called Sarah......Janis' sister....hahahaha......Janis is going to flip when she hears this. I hope she doesnt read this blog......not much chance.....afterall....some people whom I shall not name(have not identified them either) have been passing this adress to like the whole bloody world....now evn people I dont know read it. Hope no one attempts to steal my blog....not tt i can do anything abt it anyway, since am computer illiterate. Got duty tmrw....damn sian....will sleep early tonite. Thats all for today folks. =)

Poameister:Alter-Ego

2005-07-12T07:27:00.000-07:00

Just who is the Poameister, is it fact or fiction? Does he exist? How did he come into existence ?

To begin with, how many of you actually know abt the great Ali G ? Yes....the super duper cool funky brit.... HE's actually not real ! Ali G's actually the creation of a white man over a radio station......In that same sense, the Poameister's also a creation of moi to amuse myself and all you loyal fans out there.

In no way should one think that I am actually like the Poameister, well......actually, technically, we are the same person, but the real me is more all rounded and nicer. Poameister is merely part of me, it doesn't define me.......

So how'd I come to adopt this caricature of mine ? First, the name, Poameister is derived from the Stiffmeister of American Pie, obviously a less obnoixious one...but definitely the idea is there....Next, the reason for this creation of mine is because, me being the lonely and unsociable and unwanted one that I am, plus the fact that there are many unsolved issues within me, needs an outlet where I can vent my frustrations and all. BTW, yours truly is in the initial stages of athelete's foot/footrot......my 4th toe on the right feet is bloody going to waste.....fuck....am disfigured.....

Moreover, much of my rantings are usually of a high readable quality(dun bluff, all of you have a fit when you read my irrestible articles).

Y am I writing this article ? Its because yours truly has found out abt the tons of people whom have been reading this blog without my permission....ie, I did not specifically ask you to read my blog. But its ok, I forgive all of you, just don't judge me purely based on what you have read here, not tt I give a damn, unless of course you are some mega hottie. Most importantly, this blog must never fall into the hands of selected people(ie Church Elders), who might then see fit to 'counsel' and brainwash yours truly, which would be regretable for all you peeps out there loyally waiting for my every new entry.

Until then, happy reading !

The Twin.

2005-07-06T06:31:00.000-07:00

My gawd, I always knew I had the features to rival most girls(sharp nose, dreamy eyes, nice cheekbones) but never in my wildest dreams did I imagine meeting my female counterpart/clone. If I was a lil more computer savy, all of you may actually have had the chance to see the pix........but too bad, all u have, unfortunately, is my description.

Anyway, by proxy now, this person has made my favorite people shortlist.(Testament of how much yours truly truly admires himself and all things modelled after him.) The fact that she can cook damn well in terms of mass production and organising paintball sessions are plus points. If she becomes a fan of me then even better ! This one here has potential to make it to the year-end list of the Poameister's favorite people.

She has the same eyebrows and eyes as me......even got dark eyerings......one of my not so nice features and definitely shld be operated on by none other than the great Woffles Wu. The similarities in what I term as the 'winning smile' is uncanny. The difference as I can tell from my analysis of the pixs is that she has rounder features, etc, that sharp and defined nose, cheekbone and chinny chin chin of mine.

To conclude, I think she is hot, which by proxy makes me h0tter. =) And that makes me happy.

*The name and identity of this above mentioned person is protected. Cos I feel like it. =p

Favourite People(Shortlist)

2005-06-29T07:53:00.000-07:00

No rankings as of yet but here's just a shortlist of people, if you're not here, don't fret, be nicer to me and maybe you'll make the next list. At the end of the year I will then decide on my top ranking lists of people. Names here are all random and not ranked.

Church
1. Jon and Xinyi(package) : ones the YAG grp leader and the other is my copy hw friend(I did the copying) in JC. Xinyi also teaches my sister music and is a nice and dependable friend. Jon's provided me with enough alcohol to like kill a cow(am still alive). Love them both to pieces(puke blood, so mushy).

2.Jocelyn: Sweet and bubbly girl tts always there to provide a listening ear to my incesetant babbling. Remember I went cycling with her after our A-Level results. Was worried she might actually kill herself or something......at that time I just joined the group and didnt know her at all. haha. Auntie June loves her and keeps advertising her as the 'perfect catch'. So yah, am not the only one having her on the favourite list. lol.

3.Rest of cell group: Matts a nice cook...mmm. Emerald eats all the food...and reads my blog faithfully(plus 10 positions). Joel boh's a nice fella....altho irritating at times with his cheeken accent. Sarah and Puss in Boots are funny innocent looking fellas.....must be wary of them during card games or anything to do with the emotional side of things. Adrian cannot be described with mere words.

4. Esther and Timmy: The 'naicha' and drinking kakis frm church.Timmy's this uber cool fella. Esther's the bubbly and friendly one that always laughs and smiles. Nice people.

5. Quek Mong Hua: Defending my father for his case and doing a superb job of it. Aspire to be as successful a lawyer as him. Maybe one day I'll face him in court(ambition).

6. Uncle David(co-sunday school teacher): Funny guy, plus I owe him 30 bucks.

7. My kids: Love them all(and no, not in a felic or freudian way).

8. GOD: Obviously.

Disclaimer.

2005-06-29T07:42:00.000-07:00

Any resemblance to anyone or anything in this blog is purely coincidental. If there's any offence taken with the any of my articles, just please go away and mind your own business, this blog's exclusively only for people I like to read.

If I write bad things here about you, it can mean 2 things, 1. I hate ur guts. 2. I love you despite all your imperfections(no one's perfect).

If I write good things about you(very seldom), u'd better be happy and just accept whatever praises I send your way, treasure them like its the last drops of water when u're caught in a desert with no chance of getting any water.

Finally, WOCCs past or present or future are not allowed to read this blog until after I ORD(310506).

Thank you so much for being a fan of this blog. All this would not have been possible unless I knew I had such a dedicated audience such as yourselves. Cheers and God Bless. =-)

A most enjoyable wkend.

2005-06-27T08:58:00.000-07:00

He has just woke up from his slumber.........

Reflecting on his wkend, something that he never thought he would enjoy so much.

A letter
25 June 2005,
Heaven

Dear God,

Yours truly has really enjoyed the camp. Met so many nice people. Some who have actually made my top 10 favorite church people list(another time). Learnt so many new things, like the nai cha game. Am truly remorseful for being unable to worship you along with the others on the 2nd day when I was nursing a hangover, will do that next time though.

Yours truly, madly, deeply,
dA PoaMister(the i is supposed to be dragged out long and pronounced as 'i')

World Domination

2005-06-20T04:36:00.000-07:00

Am going to take over the world!!!!! hahahaha(wicked laughter).

Have been playing risk almost the whole of today, from 10 in the morn till 3 in the afternoon, non stop plotting and dice-rolling, mymy, never envisaged myself playing risk while serving the nation. lol. Builds up my leadership and strategising skills I must say. Well, its for the greater good, afterall, am an instructor of future officers and leaders of the country(everyone can gasp now. Gasp!), so must keep myself primed towards this challenge. haha.

Am bloody good at risk I found out, almost took over the entire bloody world, had south america, africa and europe within my grasp and was proceeding on the onslaught of north america. Being the brilliant tactician I was, I engineered the complete obliteration of my closest rival midway during the game, Napoleon Bonarparte(aka, SPZ), by turning everyone on him. Mind you, this was after my alliance had significantly weakened those scums from down under(wayne), and after a costly civil war with Braveheart William Wallace(Alistair), which drove my mighty troops out from North America(I decided to retreat so as to live to fight another day) into South America and Africa where I set up my bastions championing truth and justice(actually, all hail POA). Then there was the masterstroke where I spurned Napoleon's offer to divide the world between us, and instead allied with the very foes which forced me out of North America and also with those Uruk Hai from down under. It was this triumvrite that managed to overcome the those uppity europeans, albeit after a long-drawn out resistance which sapped the forces of both sides. All of which was very good for me as I ransacked Europe w/o the other 2 fellas noticing, cos it was all for the cause =) . This was also how I got Africa from those rotten uncouth prisoners from down under earlier in the game when my alliance was bamboozling him from all corners of the earth at about the 1/4 mark.

After Napoleon went down, it came down to the battle between the great powers of Wallace and the Poamister. Having a vastly superior and battle-hardened army, my gallant troopers forced those ruddy smelly Scots out of europe and into America. It was here that I enlisted the help of those inferior Aussies to keep up the battle in Asia and so keep Wallace on a costly 2 front war. With his forces depleted and stretched, yours truly managed to gain europe after a tremendously costly war effort. This foothold was reinforced turn after turn and b4 long forces had been mounted for the onslaught of the last remaining credible resistance to the creation of a world which would be peaceful and happy. A tremendously violent battle ensued as Wallace's defenses tried to hold on onto their last remaining fortress(North America). Ultimately, with my 2-pronged attack from both Europe as well as South America and coupled with the Aussies assaulting Wallace's forces from the east(a great battle had brewed there too, mainly with the Aussies getting whipped), The American Dream was crumbling before his very eyes and it was here that Wallace decided not to play anymore cos he was tired and his chances of winning was naught(plus we had work to do).

And so, was how the story came to pass where 5 very bored PTIs decided to take out the Risk Board and begin a quest for adventure, territorial gains and WORLD DOMINATION. Friendships tossed aside as alliances formed and broke. Losses and gains were mourned and celebrated. Trust was a matter of convienence and the only constant was the burning desire to just own it all, be it through diplomacy or confrontation. In the end, all the stars dimmed as only one shone brightly, true and strong, unwavering to the cause.

Royalty.

2005-06-19T06:30:00.000-07:00

Today emerald, one of my fans gave me feedback that my blogs getting boring. Must be the writers block setting in. The inspiration to write truly interesting snippets about my life is seriously drying up.....oh no....is my life so boring......ya....maybe. Anyways, new material today. Am going to reveal a deep secret about me........that is............ok.......everyone hold ur breath....... Yours truly, was almost a MALAYSIAN !!!!!!!

Yes yes, a malaysian, the ppl that after food drops on the floor still pick it up and blow and eat it. 10 sec rule I think.....haha. Love them....they make me feel so much better abt myself. haha, the antics that these ppl get up to, amazing I tell u....but, I met a nice malaysian girl some time ago....maybe they're not so bad after all. But nonetheless, love them or hate them, just cant do w/o them. =)

Anyways, according to my family roots, my great-grandfather was actually some temengong of kelantan a long long time ago. But unfortunately, he was assasinated....so exciting ya....am not making this up I tell u. And so, being the greedy malaysian shits that they are, his family sent his widow along with their 3 children back to China(motherland and all that crap), to like mourn for 6 years or something........crazy chinese customs.....

And so the story continues, after six years, my great grandma, bless her soul, asked to be allowed to return. But being the sly cunning cunts that they were, they claimed that there was no money for the return trip.......luckily, the shrewd old lady(uneducated by the way....so who needs to study...its for nerds) brought along her wedding dowry when she left for china, anticipating that such treachery would occur....and in due time bought her way back to kelantan. Scary shit I tell you.....am almost a chinese commie too if u look at it this way.......instead of the ol' honest to goodness me u see now I could have been a chinaman.....picture this.....unkempt or oily hair.....a funny smell......lousy complexion......and when I open my mouth all the ching chang ching chang comes out......shudder........bless that old lady's soul and brains ! On the other hand the china chicks are hot....mmmm.......plenty of zhang ziyi lookalikes. Went clubbing and told one of em that I lived in a castle in Singapore and she was like all over me.....had to even push her away......really......this is what happens when you close ur country to the rest of the bloody world....thank God am not a china man.

Back to the story, and so, great grandma and co came back. Wanted to kick everyone out but couldnt do so cos the old man left everything to my grandma, the 1st born, who could only claim everything on her 21st bday......in the mean time, nice gurantors were trying their best to siphon as much as possible frm the family fortune. So when gramps was 21, she went back home and kicked everyone out. =) They've been through quite a lot, so cant really blame her if she's really cranky and self-protective at times......for etc chasing my friends away frm the house when I was young cos she thot they wanted to steal things or waste our electricity.....lol. Unfortunately, grandma also likes to gamble.....so thats where all the money later went......and in the end they moved to singapore in this very house I am staying now in search for a better life.....the rest as they say, is history.

And so on hindsight, could've been either a crummy malaysian or a commie prc......am lucky to be a singaporean I guess....haha....majula singapura ! Anyway, on current news, went to church today with my cell grp and we decided to be more exclusive....yay, I thrive on such stuff like excluding ppl and creating my own lil clique.....not v christianly........so dun tell God.....or my kids....shhh

The Plot Resumes

2005-06-15T08:22:00.000-07:00

Welcome back all those who've missed yours truly(esp yours truly).

Haven't been undating since I left for down under. Really nice place Australia, nice weather and nice food and nice wine and nice scenary. Could get used to such a place, unfortunately am not going to australia anymore for studies......too long a time needed to graduate plus it starts only in Feb which means I have to defer my army....not good. So England here I come. =) Now the question is........where do I go in England.....have narrowed it down to 3 places, bristol, durham and london.......any suggestions people ? Am open to all.....

Madagascar is really funny, watched it the day b4 I left for Australia with my little sis, a bit of quality time there. My favorite person that is.....only person in this whole world I might stay in S'pore for and not go abroad cos I would miss out on her growing up years.....anyway...she doesnt really seem to need me around much nowsadays....too old for her I think....hugs and kisses drying up also...the other day I mistook her primary 3 instead of 4....wth...she's growing up too fast for me lar....depressing....

Went for a unique BBQ experience last Sat, Jon took us, the merry band to this funny spot in Changi, place was freaking isolated and out of the way like in a desert...but it went surprising well despite an early drizzle. Had to like dig holes in the ground to like set a bonfire and bbq fire going. Adelene's really funny.....haha.....she went there thinking out fun and adventurous it'd be until she asked us 'wheres the toilet?' Lol. Truth and realisation soon sinked in....you dont find a toilet in the wild, u 'make do' with what's available, ie, trees and bushes and wadever you can find....hahahahaha. Went back to Jons house afterwards and played all sorts of funny games on top of drinking some really strong scotch whiskey. Must've been a tad too much cos I had a minor headache the next day.....am losing my alcohol tolerance I tell you....only 4 glasses(Jon, you only saw me take 2....oooommmm). Must be the lack of clubbing and all....no more free flow parties like they used to have last time when I was in J1. Those parties were really good man...25 for like as much as I can drink....always made sure that my money was worth it by knocking lots of brew down. haha.

Until next time people !

Retrospective: God

2005-05-26T06:55:00.000-07:00

He might not be there times when I want him to, but he's always there when I need him.
Always taking, seldom giving.......

Yes, that sums up my spiritual life. Have always been in a christian school(a work of God I think), though not always a christian......Many people till now do not even believe me when I tell them I am a christian, yah, must admit that yours truly isn't what one may call a martyr, well I try.......actually......NOT. heh. Even better is the flabbergasted looks they shoot me and their words and actions of disbelief when they find out that I'm a sunday school teacher. =)

The first real incident of God being in my life was when my favourite grandma(maternal side) got into a coma. Doctors gave her almost no chance of recovery......I remember I went into the hospital into the ICU unit one day alone and just sat there.......I prayed that if she would just wake up, I would start going to church.....wake up she did a few days later and thus I tried keeping my part of the bargain by going to church to try to know Him more....not v successful, soon I stopped going to church, always giving myself excuses to skip it.....you know, the typical backslidey kinda person.

Everything in my life was kinda smooth-sailing until I entered the army and got posted to the God-forsaken Sispec(School of Infantry Specialists). The days there were just terrible, faced with inferior instuctors and the horrid notions that for once, I wasn't good enough for the so called upper echelons(OCS). Yes, the instructors there(Foxtrot) are terribly lousy at whatever they do, be it planning to actually teaching anything. Being punished and blamed for everything, including faults of the instuctors.....I really asked God why the hell was I there. In fact I was on the brink of giving up and getting myself downgraded if I wasn't getting a favourable posting(either going to OCS or being a PTI) after the initial stages of training. Luckily, God was there when I needed him and I was posted to become a PTI. Imagine the joy I felt to be leaving the cesspool! It was here that I finally realised that the relationship I had with God all along was one-sided. Finally, ended up at where I am now at OCS where I am a PTI. Really nice and comfy life even if I do say so myself. It was here that I decided to give back some of what I had taken and u know, spread the love. So that's how I'm a Sunday School teacher. Still am going for a mission trip ! ;P

The Amazing Race

2005-05-22T07:16:00.000-07:00

Took part in a church event today. Had to bring my kids to Changi Airport for a Race/Treasure HUnt. Despite my scheming ways and blatent cheating(hope none of my kids or their parents see this or I'll be impeached faster than you can say cigar...lol), we lost.......dammit......must be God trying to tell me that the dark side doesn't always win.....like how Arse-Anal beat the valiant Devils in the FA Cup Final on penalties.....those no good scums....but why is the better half of manchester nicknamed tt of the devils....shouldn't it be angel.....the "red angels"...hmmm, sounds wussy.

But retrospectively speaking, its probably for the better that Team Poa which goes by the alias Galilee 3 didnt win today. Mustn't expose the poor kids to all the harsh realities of this world.....must let them think that good will triumph over evil.....like how we were ousted by this team that played honestly(maybe its because the dumb klutz of teacher didnt realise that there was an additional teachers clue pack that came with the envelopes that were passed to us at the start.) No matter, am not a sore loser.......fucky, i lost....bargghhh! Am going to escape theme park with the kids next week for cohesion day. Am the ultimate coolest teacher in sunday school I tell u. I really like being with these kids, whom whilst on the brink of adolescence and the angst and darkness that comes with it, they maintain this child-like innocence which is a real inspiration for ol' me. Sometimes I wonder if it is really me who is the teacher....well, proven today that the bad guys don't always win aint it? Maybe doing things the right way will somehow or someway work out with the grace of God.

Went for a church bbq yesterday, xinyi brought a pretty friend along, from canada. A real breath of fresh air from the mundane s'pore girls......oops....mustn't be so superficial....must be nice. What I really meant was urm.....nice down to earth s'pore girls? yah, that sounds nice.....what a pity she's leaving for Canada soon. = ( Hope Xinyi tells her good things abt me.....otherwise she can stop being my sister's music teacher. I know u're reading this oxy. =)

Am going to watch Revenge of the Sith next week. Am reading the book now so I can spot all the subtle nuances in the show like when Anakin falls to the Dark Side. A real embodiment of a flawed hero Anakin is.....fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate , hate leads to suffering.(all in a yodalish tone) OOOmmm.....am being philosophical here.(*pause for a moment of silence)

Recieved feedback that my entries are getting a tad lengthy, will try to keep it short from now onwards, mustn't spent all my genius so soon, might get writer's block like JK Rowling and produce a long if sub-standard book like in order of the phoneix. Gd nite folks and in case I don't see ya, gd morning, gd afternoon and gd evening as well. POA signing off.

The Past

2005-05-20T06:57:00.000-07:00

Most of you peeps don't know me as a kid.....but I was taller and bigger than everyone!!!! Argh.....why am I so puny now.....doesn't help that in my profession now the people come in two sizes, huge and huge with definition. Even amongst my immediate colleagues lie the world's longest bicep(Yaps), thunder thighs(amos), model(ali F), Akuma(botaks) and a rugger(nick lim). So unfair....am going to work hard now that I'm consigned to gym cos of my shin splint and inability to run.

Am amazed by my ability to write articles that mirror that of the newspaper(my articles are natural crowd pullers...lol). Look at yesterday's entry and compare it to the article in todays newpaper abt ugly guys in uni. Although I'm a guy, I actually fully agree that many wussies are in the uni.....well, all the gd ones prefer to go abroad if they can make it financially. This kinda goes back into my beliefs in eugenics, namely, rich men and capable men rather marry pretty wives right ? Darwinism acting here I should say, as its kinda like a survival of the fittest where the alpha male/female picks the best mate for itself. And when this happens, even if the guy/lady is ugly, the fact that the mate is pretty would mean that the kid has a 50% chance of looking fairly decent(according to the law of averages). Just look at the european aristocrats now, many of them are fairly good looking. Just face it people, genes are everything when it comes to natural good looks........y are my parents so short !!!!!!!!!! Argh. haha.

Back to the topic. In days of yore, yours truly was a great terror even in kindergarten where me and Raoul terrorised all the other kids with our sheer size. ahaha. Raoul for your info didnt stop growing like me and is strappling now at like 180+. Thats abt all I remember abt kindergarten....wasnt't too bright then......

Primary Sch was a blast ! Thoroughly enjoyed all of it. Remember I beat up a guy on the 1st day cos he made fun of my shirt. Dumb ass. haha. But am glad to let all you ppl out there that I am strictly a pacifist(person who does not believe in violence) rite now. haha. Lotsa soccer and fights back then. Remember in pri 3 I was like 2nd in command of a mini school gang that would go ard with wooden long rulers(80 cents) as our mode of weapon and beat other gangs up. When long rulers were banned due to their primary objective,(secondary objective was to draw lines obviously) we upgraded to the long metal pointers($1.20) that we could detract and keep in our pockets. It must have been by seeing our skirmishes that George Lucas came up with his epic fighting scenes. =) All those knocks must have taken its toll as I scored a measly 219 for my PSLE(hands up people who lost to me......damn.....no one ?), which resulted in a somewhat painful 4 years in Sec Sch.

Hai Sing Catholic(my dad still pronouces it as hai shing, despite numerous corrections, proof of his subconcious disappointment that his son ain't a chip of the old block, he's a bloody Rafflesian, part of the reason I went to AC so that I wld have common RI haters. heh), a real eye opener. For once, life wasn't the nice bed of flowers that I was supposed to have fallen on, everything was different, the way people talked and their outlooks on life. The 1st 6 months were horrible in many ways I cannot describe....maybe that's why I flunked my mid-years, the last time I ever did badly in an exam at that school. But I can't deny that it was fun in a way, in fact, my sec 2 year still rates as among my fave years. haha. Totally corrupt as a class moniter and thoroughly enjoyable for everyone who benefitted too through all the cheating during class tests and the facade of us being thought of as obedient....haha, those lookouts i posted were really effective! But still, it was difficult for yours truly to really fit in with crowd, I always felt that I was somehow there, and yet excluded at the same time as if there was an invisible boundary between me and the rest.....was terribly ugly then with my centre parting(trying to fit in..) and super thin frame.....my mother thought I looked like a horse....I think so too(even now, when I feel sad, I juz look at those ol' sec 1 photos and I start laffing at myself...am sick la).....ah well, at least I like to think I am an ugly duckling and the true metamorphisis was seen at the prom in sec 4 where the great one was crowned prom king...lol....yay, am nt ugly anymore! Oh ya, and class valedictorian too.....still trying to retrieve the video of my graduation so I can hear my speech over and over again. Am a narcissist now la, what to do, spent 4 years thinking I was hideous, no thanks to all those 'nice' comments made by others around me, really low on self-confidence during that point of life....... Sucky, ugly and stupid.....who wouldn't be ? *pause for laughter by reader*

Anyway, in a nutshell, that is my past, could go on and on, and maybe I will....another time when I have nothing else to write abt. Always a good topic. Stay tuned folks, soon to come topics will include, Amelia(just to whet your appetite), the Poamister's top 10 ranking of fave and hated people and many more!!!!

Minimum Requirement.....

2005-05-19T07:36:00.000-07:00

Its hard being nice........the guys in camp are having a riot now that I'm on a new found path to niceness....must control myself................argggh..

Have decided that this blog will be dedicated to the people around me. People are so interesting, especially those around me. Am going to try as best as possible to showcase the great people who've been in my life. Stay tuned to this blog, its going to be EXPLOSIVE !

At least I'm able to go for my driving lessons next wk cos the training dates have been changed. yay. Went so early to camp today for this extremely redundant instructor's day on safety. Any safer and we'd be just twiddling our thumbs throughout our entire army life. Needless to say, it was terribly boring.

Am thinking of whether to go for the mission trip(yay, am on the path to niceness and all things good!). Still owe God one mission trip.....must try to go for one......my resolve will not be broken. Am thinking of like being a social escort to raise money for myself for this trip........the nice kind of social escort....not the hanky panky ones....in the spirit of being nice. Worse come to worse if I can't manage to sqeeze out time for this, will just help jocelyn by giving her the proceeds from my social escort wages. Always wanted to be one.......escort scouts out there......don't wait! HIRE ME! I need the cash too.. though I dun really need it..always better to have more money then less money. =) Still remember when I was training to be a PTI, I had all these great ideas of like setting up a social escort agency......am a budding extrepreneur! Maybe this will be a start to bigger and better things.

Back to the topic finally! MiN. Requirement! I sort of eavesdropped on a friend's conversation that day and found out that I was like a min requirement for a bf for most ppl.......sounds gd at first....but now that I think of it....its bloody insulting. TMD! Am not minimum....am MAXIMUM......I think that with the paucity of quality guys around......setting me as the minimum is definitely way too high. No wonder less and less women are getting married and all....later too....perhaps after waiting so long for someone good enough....they can't find one and so they just grab like the closest and bestest one they can find.(not v gd by the way.....maybe thats y singaporeans have like one of the lowest sex rate in the world....nt to mention the low birth rates.....who wants ugly kids????) Well, I'm going to wait for the truly 'right' one, can't imagine myself being with someone just for the sake of not being left on the shelf.....yes, all you folks can laugh now, I'm a terrible romantic and all sweet inside. What's my minimum requirement? Some of you maybe lovestruck fans might ask? Actually I don't really know myself, I'll just know when it comes, that I'm sure.....its just that there hasn't been like anyone for a long long time.....maybe I just can't let go of the past. Maybe that's why my standards are like nearly impossible to meet now....protective mechanism? After all, based on my current standards....she wouldn't even make it pass the initial appraisal...I guess I think I'm like so over this, but I just can't explain like why I can't really feel for anyone anymore.....ah well, I'll find someone perfect to my standards one day and this time I'm actually going to put someone other than the Poamister as 1st place and I'm going to cherish it unlike the last time. Love is neither practical nor pragmatic nor even pretty, instead, it transcends beyond anything words can describe.

This is the Poamister, signing of! damn, always wanted to say that. =)

For my Fans !

2005-05-18T06:28:00.000-07:00

Amos said today he's gonna like ask all his lil friends to come by my blog. Now have to make it more appealing to everyone. More mainstream like and definitely more entertaining. Maybe I'll get more popular. haha.

Realised today that I wouldn't be able to take my driving lessons next week cos of some dumb PT course aimed at helping us with the new WOCC(Women Officer Cadet)..........cunts.......women shouldn't join the army. Yah, being rather sexist here....but its true......oweing to the paucity of the fairer sex in the army, and coupled with like many despos......these women often get their way.....if not they would just like throw tantrums and cause a whole lot of trouble. Nonetheless, some of them actually are better then the men....sad to say but so true. Like now, there like 2 WOCCs that can like whip 70% of their male counterparts in the 2.4 km run........these guys had better take a good long look at themselves........pathetic is the state I would define the fitness levels of the majority of our soldiers....the so-called defenders of our beautiful and wonderful and vibrant country, this is also applicable to me..sad to say, that the high standards set by our fore fathers have depreciated to such a low level. In fact, today I was just demonstrated to how wimpy our wonderful army has become. NS men, aka reservist with huge bellys and receding hair lines had at least the balls to perform a 5m confidence jump into the pool(no big deal I know)....it wasnt a pretty sight but at least they did it with the minimum fuss. Contrasted to our so called cream of the army, THE OFFICER CADETs, some of whom have such a phobia, that they don't even dare go near the ledge of the pool. I'd better get a sum of money ready so that if a war breaks out I'd have the means to relocating my family to like china or something where we can like grow a farm and survive on subsistence farming. lol

Still can't get any damn photos of myself to upload on the blog....I think I'll just keep this as a photo-less one. Safer you know, with all these poor people nowsadays being persecuted for their own thoughts. Nonetheless, I would still like to put a disclaimer here that any resemblance to anyone or anything in this blog is purely coincidental and if you are offended in anyway, please just go elsewhere. BTW, for those who read yesterday's entry, I am trying to be nicer to people in general....nt v pretty....oops there I go again. At least I was nice to Amos today. There! Oh, and there's a new colleague in office today, must try to be nice to him.....aint nothing much to look at.....actually.....please dont look.....but its all in the spirit of being nice to everyone...something I've been struggling to do all day. But I'll at least try to add a tagboard so that I'll be interacting with all my fellow......people, friends, fans....whatever.....

my 1stest ever post !

2005-05-17T08:07:00.000-07:00

This is not meant to be seen by people I don't like so if I don't like you please get lost. =) . Pretty people are always welcome though. I like pretty.......so superficial am I. Today is another boring day in camp.......where the usual programme is as follows........8-9 reach camp, 9.30 breakfast.....1030....internet at the library....12 back to sleep in bunk......1430 hit the gym......1700 'homegoing'(a new word me and amos came up with...how original!). And now I'm here trying to create a blog....probably wouldn't last long considering my super short attention span......in fact juz tried to create a blog on xanga.com but cos it was too freaggin slow tts y I'm here. Sucky xanga! =)

Star Wars is finally coming out.....how I wish I had a lightsaber(the one in the movies....not the ultra big and long one tt I have now. ) to go slice all the people I don't like.......so many.. at last count, I was racist, elitist, uglist(don't like ugly people)....am such a sad critical bitch.......arghh....can't wait to geddout of this god damned army. Such a waste of time......at least I've got a nice and relaxing job with decent looking people(even Chief looks pretty interesting if you don't look at him in the context of a human. heh). At last count, the team had like the world's longest bicep, AKUMA, a model, an anus, a rugger(a bit thick) and a sunbear, just to name a few. Ah.....got some lessons coming up this wk, am gonna start abusing my power and start killing me some cadets,I keep saying that but never actually do it......must have some determination!!!!

Had an interesting conversation with amos today......abt how superficial I am and how I am going to change to be a better person. Amen. Will try to be nice to him tomorrow. haha. Thats it for today, I hope no one drowns tomorrow for my confidence jump tomorrow.